by Hiwaru Kibi (火悪 木美)

“Babe,” I said, “you are going to lose us our deposit.”

Mimi rolled her eyes as she peeked out around the corner. “Please. You think we’re introducing the ancient Athenians to the concept of nudity? Have you ever been to an art museum?”

I was absolutely not going to admit that she had a point, because I absolutely wasn’t going to give up on how I had a point too, and that point was that the time machine rental place was strict as hell about what would happen if they had to get in there and clean up any timeline discrepancies you’d caused. And here I’d thought taking her to Charlemagne’s court had been tempting fate.

At least I’d talked her into wearing shoes. If you’ve never seen a street that predates indoor plumbing, then you’ll just have to trust me that it’s nowhere you want to put your feet. From the soles of her feet up, however, my girlfriend was completely nude. 

She pulled up the city map on the inner screen and traced a little rectangle through the streets that ended back in the same place it started — the place we were right then. “This is the route. Better keep up.” She gave me a wink and then hopped right out the door of the machine, into the ancient Greek air.

What was I supposed to do? I followed along, clad in the more period-appropriate dress the rental place had supplied for our little jaunt. I had to trust her (and the readouts from the machine) that we had actually landed in Athens; Mimi was the history buff in the relationship, while I was lucky if I could tell the Renaissance from a hole in the ground. But I lived to make her happy, so when she declared that she wanted to time travel for her birthday, well, what was I going to say, no?

I don’t know if Mimi had done the math or just lucked out about it, but the streets were relatively empty, especially given some of the other ancient city sights we’d visited together. Relatively empty didn’t mean completely empty, though, which meant that Mimi had exactly the audience she wanted.

Maybe the ancient Athenians were used to the naked female body. But from the reactions she was getting, I’d say they probably weren’t used to seeing it casually stroll down the street on a warm summer day, clad in nothing but a pair of period-appropriate leather sandals. One man let out a shocked gasp, and Mimi responded with a cheerful little wave.

I tailed along right behind her, just far back enough that I could see the soft curves of her ass jiggle with each step she took. I could have reached out and given her butt a smack, but that would just have encouraged her, and I was not encouraging her. If she thought I approved of a stunt like this, there was no telling what she’d try to pull off next time. With my luck, we’d end up in a threesome with a samurai or teaching the ancient Babylonians about nipple clamps, and then we’d really lose the deposit.

Mimi stretched her arms casually high above her head, like, oh, am I turning every head as I stroll completely naked down the boulevard? I hadn’t noticed. “They’re looking at you like you’re crazy,”

“They probably just think I’m one of the maenads,” Mimi said, like that was supposed to mean something to me. “And who’s to say I’m not? Here, go right.” She turned as we entered the intersection, and I tagged along behind, breathing a sigh of relief that this crazy naked field trip idea of hers was now at least a quarter of the way done.

She didn’t linger, but she didn’t hurry either, greeting everyone who stared at her with a smile or a wave. Every so often, she’d look back over her shoulder to make sure I was still with her, still watching. She shook her head and let her long brown curls swoop down across her bare back. Maybe she’d wind up being someone’s muse here, the inspiration for something in one of those art museums she’d mentioned earlier. With the number of eyes on her now, it didn’t seem so far-fetched that I might walk into a gallery someday and see her marble face staring back at me from atop a pedestal.

Though to be fair, I doubted many people were looking at her face.

The second corner we turned put us onto a busier street, this with more vendors and passers-by and even a few soldiers. I was most nervous about them, but they just whistled and clapped as she did a little twirl for them. In the midday sun, her honey skin glowed warm. 

If she had somehow been introducing these ancient peoples to the concept of female nudity, she sure was a hell of a way to learn. Call me biased, but from the moment I met her, I’ve never been able to take my eyes off her, with her curvy frame and pretty round face. She could have had anybody on that road, with the way they all kept staring at her appreciatively. And yet she kept turning back, smiling at me, winking at me, letting me know who was actually on her mind.

As we turned the third and final corner on her route, I felt a rush of relief — there it was, at the far end of the street, the little blue glow that only we could see, letting us know the location of the disguised time machine. I was about to say something to Mimi, to make sure she’d noticed, went I felt a hand close in the front of my dress. I turned to look just in time to see the smirk on her face as she yanked me into a little side alcove. It looked like a little shrine of some kind, partway exposed to the street, but still all but hidden behind the buildings that flanked it.

“What are you–?” I asked, but that was all the question I got out before Mimi had me up against the wall, kissing me. 

She raked her fingers through my short hair, pressing her body up against mine. She was shorter than I was, but boy did she understand leverage. “That got me so fucking wet,” Mimi moaned. She grabbed my hand and yanked it between her legs. In the soft, warm valley between her thighs, I could feel how right she was. She gasped as my fingers brushed against her clit. “Did you see the way they looked at me?”

I had, and what was more, I felt a rush of jealousy when I heard her talk about it like that. Of course, this had clearly been Mimi’s plan all along and I was just playing into her hands — but when she got like this, how was I supposed to refuse? “This isn’t exactly private,” I pointed out, glancing out toward the street just beyond us.

“So?” Mimi laughed. “You’re not afraid we’re going to introduce the ancient Athenians to the concept of lesbianism, are you?”

Well, okay, no, I knew enough of my history to understand that one. Mimi rubbed her pussy against my hand, begging me to give her more. I was hardly in a position to refuse, so I spread my first two fingers into a V and got one on either side of her clit. I pressed in hard, making her cry out with pleasure. She apparently cared about being overheard about as much as she cared about being seen.

Damn the deposit, then. I pushed her back against a low table, shoving aside what looked to be a statue to some local god or goddess. Move over, whatever deity was supposed to be here; this shrine had a new object of worship today. Mimi grinned as she spread her thighs wide for me, looking down with a wicked smirk as I knelt on the floor in front of her. I started at her knee and kissed my way up her inner thigh, until my lips were wet with her juices. “Come on,” she pleaded, brushing her fingers down the curve of my ear. “I want to see you.”

As long as we were in here, it wasn’t like things could get much more risqué. I sat back on my heels just long enough to shrug the top of my sleeveless dress off my shoulders. The fabric fell to my waist easily; I think the real things are more difficult to put on, but the replicas never mind a few structural shortcuts. “Better?” I asked.

Mimi nodded, then grabbed for my hair again. It wasn’t long enough for her to shove me around, but I got the message anyway. This time I skipped the preamble and pressed my mouth right up to her slit. I licked my tongue up around her clit, alternating between teasing it with little flicks and rubbing hard. As I ate her out, I took my fingers and slipped one inside of her.

“Oh, fuck,” Mimi moaned, the sound half-muffled by her palm across her mouth. She hooked her knees up over my shoulders, mock-trapping me in place with her thighs as I spread her pussy wide. “Fuck, that’s so good.”

I’m not going to say our relationship was built on my skills at giving oral, but that was definitely what had made Mimi call me the next morning after the dorm party where I’d eaten her out through three screaming orgasms and left her passed out on the living room couch. From that moment on, there hadn’t been a thing I wouldn’t do for her, and dammit, she knew it.

I pushed two more fingers inside of her, stretching her pussy wide. She was always easy to get in the mood, but she was right; her little exhibitionist walk had gotten her worked up. I lapped my tongue up against her, then closed my lips around the bud of her clit, sucking as I continued to move my fingers in and out of her. With my other hand, I yanked up the hem of the dress and rubbed my own pussy in time with the way I was fucking her. Every time I hit one of her spots just right, I could feel her thighs tremble as they pressed against either side of my face.

The closer I worked her up to her orgasm, the louder she got. By now, I was sure there were at least a couple people behind me on the street, spectators gathered to see what debauchery these two women were up to today. Well, I hope they enjoyed the show, because I sure as hell was enjoying putting it on.

It wasn’t long before Mimi started bucking her hips, lifting herself with her knees as she begged with her body, harder, deeper. I did all I could to oblige, licking and finger-fucking her all the way to a noisy, beautiful climax. She drew in a deep breath and held it, then released it with a shuddering moan as her body shook around me. I could feel her inner muscles grip my fingers tight, then let go as she draped herself, boneless, against the back wall of the shrine.

Still kneeling, I rubbed my fingers hard against my cunt as I looked up at her. She looked perfectly like a goddess like that, staring down at me through her halo of soft, post-orgasmic bliss. I drew my tongue across my lips, tasting her on me as she gave me a smile — her own little blessing, paid in return for my devotion. I closed my eyes and came right there, shuddering and gasping against the dirt floor of the shrine.

Sprawled out there afterward, I had a wild thought: Maybe we could stay here, start a new religion dedicated to her, the goddess of casual nudity and semi-public oral sex. It was hard to imagine that wouldn’t be an overnight success. I could be her high priestess, dedicated to ensuring her blessings by keeping her completely satisfied. We could make a hell of a life for ourselves that way.

Until, of course, our rental expired and we got banned from using their service again forever. Even so, might be worth it.

“Come on,” Mimi said, and she grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet, into a warm kiss. Then she squeezed my hand and began to run back out into the street, dragging me along with her. I didn’t even have time to fix my dress before she was pulling me along behind her, topless and laughing, just a pair of madwomen scrambling down the streets of Athens three thousand years before our own birthdays, headed back to our own future together.


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4 thoughts on “Anachronism

  1. Cute, sexy, and got a couple giggles out of me (introducing ancient Greeks to lesbianism, ha!). I also love the totally mundane “lose the deposit on our time machine rental” — it’s so fun to have that concept out there offhand and we just get to roll with it. And, realistically, get distracted by the naked woman along with all the background characters. :)

  2. Time machine rentals! Getting the deposit back! A hilarious and delightful concept to accompany some hot exhibitionism. Where can I get me one of those time machines!!!!!! I love the beat about staying and staring a religion. What a relatable mood about a lover! Very fun and funny.

  3. This is a perfect opening story for a zine like this: short, sweet, snappy, and a lot of fun! Caring more about the minutiae of time machine EULAs than how they work makes it feel distinctly human, too, since the average person is willing to accept that technology more or less functions magically until it breaks or someone comes around yelling about a breach of acceptable use clauses. I enjoyed the implication that this is hardly the first time Mimi has caused problems on purpose during her and the narrator’s birthday jaunt. The slightly weary familiarity with the tech means the characters’ personalities don’t get overwhelmed by tech stuff we don’t really need. Who cares how time travel does its thing? There’s alcove sex to be had!

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