Holding Out

by Kougyoku (紅玉)

(mirrors http://s2b2.livejournal.com/293493.html)

It was late in the evening. In the kitchen an empty pizza box sat next to a stack of dirty dishes. Through the door the living room lay empty, with the TV on standby and an open DVD case on the floor beside it.

All life in this flat, it seemed, had migrated to the bedroom. Here the curtains were drawn and the standing lamp was on, casting a soft yellow light across the white walls. The pattering of a rain shower sounded against the windows. And on the bed, sprawled over a tumult of dark blue
sheets, were two people.

The first was named Ijaz. He was naked and on his back, with his legs spread wide and toes curling. The second, called Jonathan, was just as naked and was kneeling between Ijaz’s spread legs with Ijaz’s cock in his mouth.

They were quiet for the most part. The only noises in the room were the wet sounds that Jonathan’s lips made, Ijaz’s condom shining beneath them. Jonathan’s back was shining too, sweat dampening his wide shoulders and his dark skin glistening between his shoulder blades. Ijaz’s skin was lighter in contrast, but not by much, especially not when he was so flushed from arousal, right from his nose down to the smattering of hair on his breastbone. He was sweating too; his straight, black hair sticking messily to his forehead.

Jonathan couldn’t see, engaged as he was, but Ijaz was watching him, dark-eyed. Shakily, Ijaz ran his fingers through Jonathan’s short, black curls, but it lasted for only a moment before Ijaz’s head fell back against the pillows with a woomph, his throat trembling and tongue working between his teeth.

Slowly, Jonathan’s lips moved back upwards, mouthing the crown of Ijaz’s cock.

“Fuck,” breathed Ijaz.

Jonathan stilled, then lifted his head, his own face flushed. “You want me to stop?” he asked.

Ijaz’s chest heaved. “Not yet.” He glanced down at Jonathan. “I’ll let you know when.”

Jonathan grinned. “Fair enough.” He went back to work, his tongue finding the underside of Ijaz’s cock and lips closing over the head.

“Fuck,” said Ijaz again. He pressed his head back into the pillow, raising his arms to clutch his long fingers in his own hair. “Fuck. Fuck.”

Jonathan chuckled in his throat and Ijaz reached down to brush one of his thumbs across Jonathan’s scalp, the back of his hand trembling.

Eyes closed, Jonathan ducked his head to take more of Ijaz into his mouth, his fingers smoothing their way around the base of Ijaz’s cock. Ijaz’s toes were curling again, his calves taut.

It was as Jonathan was beginning to bob his head, just getting into a rhythm, that Ijaz reached down a shaking hand to tap him on the shoulder.

“Stop. Stop.” Ijaz’s voice was breathy and thick. “Stop. God. Please. Stop.”

With a deep breath, Jonathan did as he was asked. He sat up, flushed lips curving into a smile. Ijaz’s cock, now neglected, twitched a little but refused to soften, the condom shining with saliva.

“Fuck.” Ijaz fell back against the pillow and covered his eyes with a forearm. “Fuck.” His legs shifted, dragging his heels across the sheets. “I really want to come. Really want to. Fuck it.”

Jonathan’s eyelids fluttered, watching him.

“Dammit.” Ijaz sucked in a breath and writhed some more.

Jonathan licked his lips and crawled up to the top of the bed, sitting with his back against the wooden headboard. “We can come if you want to,” he said, reaching out to brush Ijaz’s shoulder.

Ijaz whined, and shook Jonathan’s hand away. “Don’t touch me. Fuck.” Ijaz rolled onto his side, legs tense and toes curling again. “I’m so close I… Fuck.” He closed his eyes and took several slow, shuddery breaths.

Jonathan’s laugh was warm. “You want to keep going, then?”

“Yeah,” said Ijaz, voice muffled as he pressed his face into his pillow. His cock twitched again.

Jonathan’s cock wasn’t quite as hard as Ijaz’s but it wasn’t far off. While Ijaz was quiet, Jonathan gave himself a few gentle strokes, working a thumb over the head, his skin dark beneath the condom and the thick muscles in his thighs tensing.

Finally, Ijaz sighed. He rolled over to face Jonathan and gave him a flushed smile.

Jonathan smiled in return and let go of his cock.

“How long has it been?” asked Ijaz.

Jonathan shrugged and leaned over to the bedside table to look at his phone. “Twenty minutes,” he said over his shoulder.

“Only twenty minutes?” moaned Ijaz. He ran a hand over his face. “Twenty minutes and I already feel like I’m going to die of frustration.”

“Why don’t we end it now, then?” suggested Jonathan, sitting back and smiling down at Ijaz. “I know you don’t want to come just yet but twenty minutes is cool.”

“No. Man.” Ijaz screwed up his face. “Twenty minutes isn’t anything. That’s chickenshit.”

Jonathan laughed. “Chickenshit?”

“Chickenshit,” agreed Ijaz, rolling onto his back to look up at the ceiling. “I mean, some people can go at it for hours. I saw this video of this one guy, and he’d been edging for, like, two whole hours, and he couldn’t stay still, couldn’t keep his hands off himself he was that horny and–” Ijaz’s cock twitched again and he rolled back onto his side. “Fuck it. Fuck. I need to stop talking about this or I swear I’m going to come without being touched at all.”

Jonathan stared at him. “Shit, that’s hot, Ijaz.”

“Shut up.” Ijaz slapped the side of Jonathan’s hip. “Shut up. Shut up. If you say things like that I really will do it.” He gave Jonathan a desperate look. “Talk about something unsexy. Please.”

“OK, then.” Laughing, Jonathan scooted down to lie facing Ijaz, propping his head in his hand. “Did you finish that report for Sheila?”

“Aw, man.” Ijaz scowled. “Seriously? You want to talk about work?”

Jonathan shrugged. “You asked for unsexy.” He grinned. “Have you finished that report then?”

Ijaz turned to pout at the ceiling. “No.”

“Didn’t you say it was due, like, next week?”

“Yeah, but it’s not like I haven’t been busy. You know I’ve been busy.”

“I’m not complaining.” Jonathan raised his eyebrows. “But I’m not the one who has to deal with Sheila when she doesn’t get it on time.”

Ijaz huffed. “It’s not fair,” he said. “How did you get Fran as a boss when I got Sheila?” He turned to frown at Jonathan. “I’d kill to have Fran instead. She’s so much nicer. Who did you sleep with to get her?”

Jonathan laughed deeply. “You think I went un-gay to sleep with my boss?”

“I didn’t say you slept with Fran, just someone up the chain who–”

“Maybe I slept with Sheila.”

Ijaz made a face. “Oh, don’t.”

Jonathan laughed some more. “Well, maybe I did. If I’d un-gay for anyone, why not her?”

“You are not serious,” said Ijaz, nose wrinkling.

“Maybe I like the stern, head-teacher type. She could tell me off in the bedroom.” Jonathan gave Ijaz a smirk. “You know you want her to tell you off in the bedroom. That’s why you haven’t finished that report, isn’t it?”

“Oh, God.” Ijaz gave a despairing laugh. “Fuck it. I said, ‘say something unsexy,’ not, ‘say something terrifying.'”

Jonathan laughed in return, the sound darkening as Ijaz scooted across to put a hand on Jonathan’s erection.

“You okay to touch me again?” whispered Jonathan.

“Yeah,” breathed Ijaz. He sniggered. “You fucking scared all my arousal away.”

Jonathan grinned and licked his lips, making them shine in the light from the lamp. “Glad it worked.” He looked down as Ijaz curled his long fingers into a loose fist and started to stroke. “I think I’ll talk about Sheila again next time you want to calm down.”

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Ijaz gave Jonathan a playful kick to the shins and Jonathan chuckled.

Snorting a laugh, Ijaz pressed a kiss to Jonathan’s shoulder. “Let’s talk about something else.”

Jonathan took a breath and let it out. “Okay, then.” He reached down to curl his fingers gently around Ijaz’s thin wrist, following the movement. “How about Dave and Abbie’s party. Are you going?”

Ijaz hummed, looking down to his hand, then back up. “When is it again?”

“I think it’s next Saturday,” said Jonathan. He breathed out slowly.

Ijaz smiled. “Yeah, I can go to that. It’s been ages since their last party. Wasn’t that the one with the sangria?”

Jonathan’s lips curled upwards. “I’m surprised you remember that much. You were so drunk that night.”

Ijaz glared at him. “I wasn’t that drunk.”

“You fell asleep on the kitchen floor.”

“Shit.” Ijaz frowned. “I didn’t do that, did I?”

Jonathan chuckled languidly. “Katherine has photographic evidence. She took it before they moved you to the bedroom.”

“Oh, God,” Ijaz moaned. “I don’t like talking about this either.” He stopped the movement of his hand, sat up and pushed at Jonathan’s hip until he was lying on his back. Then Ijaz crawled down the bed and took Jonathan’s cock into his mouth.

Jonathan’s fingers pushed their way through Ijaz’s thick hair and Jonathan took a deep breath, chest rising. Ijaz, meanwhile, slid his lips down as far as they would go, bringing up a hand to cup the dark skin of Jonathan’s balls.

“Mm.” Jonathan’s thighs tensed. “How long have we got to hold out for again?”

Ijaz lifted his head. “Couple of hours,” he said, returning to run his pink tongue over the tip of Jonathan’s cock and moving his hand up to stroke the shaft.

Jonathan arched his back, the bedsprings creaking underneath him. “That’s fucking hard,” he said.

Ijaz hummed in agreement, which only made Jonathan’s thighs tense further.

For a while they were silent as Ijaz bobbed his head. Jonathan closed his eyes, the muscles in his arms taut and his lips parted. Ijaz reached out to run his free hand over the meat of Jonathan’s thigh and Jonathan’s stomach curled inwards. The rain continued to patter against the windows.

As the minutes passed, Jonathan’s face grew more and more flushed. He licked his lips.

“Do you think…” said Jonathan finally. He took a shuddery breath and swallowed. “Do you ever think we should, just, you know… just go for it?” His fingers in Ijaz’s hair were trembling.

Ijaz raised his head slightly, blinking. “What?” He looked at Jonathan, voice lowering. “You mean: just come?”

“Er, no.” Jonathan removed his hands from Ijaz’s hair and smoothed them shakily along his own thighs instead. “I mean: go for it.” He looked down at Ijaz. “I mean: start dating.”

Ijaz paused. “Start dating?” He sat back on his knees.

Jonathan grunted and pushed himself up until his was sitting. “Yeah,” he said, meeting Ijaz’s gaze. “You and me: start dating each other.” Jonathan scratched a hand over his head and bit his top lip. “As boyfriends.”

Ijaz’s eyes were wide. “That’s fucking big, Jonathan.”

“Well.” Jonathan frowned briefly. “Not that big. It’s just, you know.” He rubbed at his ear. “Making it official.”

Ijaz shifted back until he was nearly at the end of the bed. He gave Jonathan an incredulous stare. “That’s all it is? Making it official? It’s so much more than ‘making it official’.”

“But we already hang out a lot,” reasoned Jonathan. He gestured at the bedroom. “And we’ve been having sex for months now.”

“Yeah,” said Ijaz. “But that’s as friends. It’s different.”

Jonathan looked at him. “You don’t want to, then?”

“Look, man.” Ijaz hung his head and sighed. “It’s not that easy.”

Jonathan pressed his lips together. “Why not?”

“Because I’m not gay.” Ijaz raised his hands. “I’m not like you. I know you might have thought otherwise because we started fucking, but I’m not gay. This is just…” He gave Jonathan a desperate look. “It’s just an experiment for me. I just wanted to try it out.”

“Of course you’re not gay.” Jonathan gave a smile, but it trembled at the corners. “Anyone who saw how you used to fall over yourself to try to get Alison to like you could tell you that you’re not gay.”

Ijaz folded his arms. “Exactly. So it won’t work.” He sniffed. “Although I did not ‘fall over myself’ for Alison.”

“Look. Whatever.” Jonathan waved a hand. “I don’t care about Alison. What I’m saying is that I agree you’re not gay.” He nodded in Ijaz’s direction. “You’re bi.”

Ijaz stared at him.

“Well, aren’t you?” asked Jonathan. “You were sucking my dick a moment ago and enjoying it. Don’t you tell me that you think you’re straight.”

“It’s not that fucking easy!” Ijaz jumped off the bed and folded his arms. He stood, glaring across at the wall and studiously avoiding the photographs of friends that Jonathan had hanging there.

In the ensuing silence, the rain sounded louder than it had been before.

Jonathan tried to catch Ijaz’s eye. “Look–”

“It’s fine for you,” said Ijaz, hunching in on himself, still staring at the wall. “You know what you are. You’ve been out for years.”

Jonathan sighed. He crawled across the bed until he was sitting near to where Ijaz was standing. “Are you worried about coming out to your family?” asked Jonathan, looking up at him. “Is that what it is? I didn’t think they were that religious.”

Ijaz huffed but didn’t look down. His throat bobbed as he swallowed. “It’s not just them. It’s… it’s everything, you know? My family. My friends. Everyone at work.”

“Hey, man.” Jonathan smiled and reached across to pat Ijaz’s elbow. “You don’t have to come out to everyone at once, you know.”

Ijaz sighed and sat down. “I’m pretty sure that dating and ‘making it official’ means coming out to everyone. If I even have something to ‘come out’ about in the first place.” He turned to Jonathan. “And I really don’t fucking know about that.”

“Look,” said Jonathan. “When it comes to ‘making it official’ we can be as slow as you like. No rush.” Jonathan gave Ijaz a tentative smile. “Like, for a while even, it could be just between us; until you get used to it. But I can promise you that our friends would all be cool.”

Ijaz opened his mouth to speak.

“Seriously,” said Jonathan, “no rush.”

Ijaz huffed. “I still don’t know, man.” He fell back against the bed and looked up at the ceiling. “And this conversation is making me lose my fucking mojo.”

Jonathan pursed his lips. “You want to stop with the sex for today, then?”

“Fuck, no.” Ijaz rolled onto his side and slapped the top of Jonathan’s thigh. “What I want is to keep going.” He looked up at Jonathan. “If this is your plan to keep us going for longer, then it’s working.”

Jonathan chuckled and reached down to scrub his hand through Ijaz’s hair. “Less talking, more sex, right?”

One half of Ijaz’s mouth curled upwards. “Damn right.” With a sigh he scooted his way further up the bed and patted the dark sheets beside him. “Come on. We’ve got a long way to go before we’re done.”

Jonathan followed Ijaz’s lead and moved up the bed until they were lying facing each other. Then Jonathan stuffed a pillow under his head and reached across to run a hand over Ijaz’s bony hip. “You are going to let us come sometime today, aren’t you?”

“Maybe.” Ijaz shrugged and gave a small smile. “Or maybe I want to try and last it out until tomorrow morning.”

“Fucking cruel,” muttered Jonathan. He trailed his fingers down and curled them around Ijaz’s softening cock, then started stroking.

Ijaz’s lips parted. He wetted them with his tongue and reached across a hand to Jonathan’s cock.

Jonathan groaned and wiggled closer as Ijaz started stroking. “Feels good.”

“Mm.” Ijaz looked down to Jonathan’s cock then back up to his face. “You tell me when to stop though, yeah?”

“Yeah, don’t worry,” agreed Jonathan. “I don’t plan on coming early.” His lips curled into a smile as he met Ijaz’s gaze. “Although I’d like to.”

Ijaz flexed his back. “You want to come?”

“I’ve wanted to come since we started,” said Jonathan.

“Want to see you come,” whispered Ijaz.

Jonathan’s face flushed. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” There was a blush on Ijaz’s cheeks too. He looked down to where Jonathan was growing harder, full and dark beneath the condom, and made a twisting motion with his fingers.

Jonathan groaned again.

“Like to watch you come,” said Ijaz breathily. He swallowed. “Always like it.”

“Fuck, Ijaz.” Jonathan’s chest heaved and he switched hands, stroking Ijaz’s cock with one and smoothing the other down the length of Ijaz’s thigh, the hair on Ijaz’s legs rising in response.

Ijaz breathed heavily, screwing up his flushed face. “God.” He panted. “Slow down. Slow down a little.”

Jonathan did as he was told. Ijaz took a long breath, sniggering on the exhale. “My mojo was coming back too fast.”

“Can’t have that.” Jonathan smiled. “Too much mojo.” He rocked his hips into Ijaz’s fist, his cock pushing past Ijaz’s fingers.

“God, you feel good,” breathed Ijaz.

“Mm.” Jonathan ran his other hand up over Ijaz’s hip, watching Ijaz shift beneath the touch.

“Hey,” said Jonathan after a few seconds, “did you mean it about watching me come?”

“Oh, fuck yes,” said Ijaz. He scooted closer until he could press his lips wetly to Jonathan’s collarbone. “Always have done. Since the first time.”

“I remember that,” murmured Jonathan, looking down at the back of Ijaz’s head. “You were so fucking into it.”

Ijaz flushed and pressed his face beneath Jonathan’s jaw. “Yeah.”

Jonathan stared at the line of Ijaz’s back as it rolled with the movement of Ijaz’s hips. After a moment Jonathan opened his mouth, then closed it. Then he opened it again and asked, “What made you ask me? Back then.”

“For sex?” Ijaz’s voice was muffled by Jonathan’s skin. “The courage brought on by a whole bottle of wine, as I remember.”

“Wait.” Jonathan paused his hand for a second, then started stroking again. “Had you planned it since dinner? Is that why you refused to take the taxi home with the others?”

“Not really,” mumbled Ijaz. “I did mean it when I said your sofa looked more appealing than the taxi. But then we were alone and I was drunk and I decided I should kiss you.”

Jonathan chuckled. “Before passing out on the sofa.”

Ijaz pulled back to look Jonathan in the eye. “I didn’t pass out. I slept. I was sleeping.”

“You fell asleep mid-conversation,” said Jonathan. He arched his back.

“I’d had a long day at work,” retorted Ijaz. “Anyway,” he snorted, “once I woke up, I figured I had already done the terrifying part of coming onto you so I may as well stay for the morning.”

“I liked that part.” Jonathan moved both his hands to Ijaz’s flushed cock. “That part was good.”

“Yeah,” breathed Ijaz. “You don’t know how long I’d wanted that.”

Jonathan licked his lips. “I thought you said you hadn’t planned it.”

“Well, not that evening.” Ijaz looked down to Jonathan’s cock. “But I’d always thought…” He bit his lip. “I’d always thought that maybe I should ask you sometime; because we were, like, good friends anyway; and you didn’t seem like the type of person who’d freak out if you didn’t want to; and also you looked kind of… well…” Ijaz’s gaze flicked up and then away again. “You go to the gym and stuff, man.”

Jonathan laughed, low and deep. “You had a fucking crush on me.”

Ijaz buried his head in Jonathan’s neck again. “It was not a fucking crush,” he muttered. “Just an… interest.”

“Well, that’s good,” said Jonathan, swallowing, “because I always thought you were hot too.”

Ijaz scoffed. “With my flabby stomach and skinny arms? I knew you were mad.”

“But you were my hot and straight friend,” continued Jonathan. “Never expected you to say, ‘Hey, do you think we should fuck sometime?’ and then make out with me.”

“I did not say that.” Ijaz pulled back to frown at Jonathan. “Did I say that?”

Jonathan grinned. “I was approximating. With less slurring.”

“You’re a dick,” said Ijaz, but he was smiling too.

“Look.” Jonathan took a shaky breath and held Ijaz’s gaze. “Are you sure you don’t want to start dating? Because I think it could be really good. Don’t you think it could be good?”

Ijaz’s smile dropped away and Jonathan’s followed suit. They stared at each other for a moment, and then Ijaz pushed Jonathan onto his back, leaned across, and took Jonathan’s cock fully into his mouth.

“Oh Jesus Christ.” Jonathan clutched desperately at the sheets as Ijaz’s cheeks hollowed and he began to bob his head in a quick rhythm. “Fuck.” One of Jonathan’s legs bent at the knee, the toes on both feet curling. Jonathan’s back arched and his chest heaved, nipples dark. “Fuck fuck.”

Ijaz closed his eyes and kept going, one hand working the base of Jonathan’s cock and his lips working the rest, slicking the condom with saliva, his speed mercilessly fast.

Jonathan moaned on an exhale and he brought his hands up to skitter through Ijaz’s black hair, fingers tense and the tendons in his wrist straining. “Fuck,” he gasped. “Oh Christ. Oh. Oh. Stop stop stop stop.”

Ijaz did as he was told, immediately, sitting back on his knees and wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand. He shook his hair out of his eyes and watched as Jonathan writhed.

“Fuck.” Jonathan collapsed back against the bed, panting. “Fuck it. Fuck it. Fuck.” He covered his face with the palms of his hands and arched his back. His cock stood out hard and dark, the condom shining in the soft light of the room. “Oh Jesus,” gasped Jonathan. “Oh God.” He arched his back again.

Ijaz’s cheeks were flushed as he watched him.

“Please no more oral,” begged Jonathan from behind his hands, kicking his legs out straight, toes still curling. “If you do that again, I am going to come in a millisecond and I know you don’t want that.”

Ijaz closed his eyes. Then, taking a slow breath, he looked down and delicately unrolled the condom from his own still-hard cock. He wandered off into the bathroom for a moment, then returned and silently removed Jonathan’s condom too. Jonathan watched from behind his hands, biting his lip until it was white, but Ijaz’s touch was quick and clinical, and then he was off into the bathroom again.

When Ijaz returned, moments later, he climbed onto the bed, lay down next to Jonathan and smoothed a hand over Jonathan’s sweaty hip and down towards his cock.

“Ijaz.” Jonathan stopped Ijaz’s hand in its tracks by placing his own hand on top of it, pinning it to his waist. “I am going to be so much more sensitive without that condom on.” He gave a wry smile. “If you touch me now I will come immediately. I guarantee it.”

With a sigh, Ijaz extracted his hand and rolled over onto his back to stare at the ceiling, lacing his long fingers together over his stomach.

“Hey.” Jonathan was frowning. He sat up and looked down at Ijaz. “Hey, Ijaz, you’re being really quiet.”

Ijaz didn’t reply.

“Oh fuck.” Jonathan drew his knees up to his chest and rested his elbows against them. “Fuck, Ijaz, I’m sorry, man. I was being too pushy, wasn’t I?”

Ijaz pursed his lips.

“Look.” Jonathan reached down and patted Ijaz’s shoulder until Ijaz looked him in the eye. “Seriously,” said Jonathan, “just forget I said it. You don’t want to start dating and that’s fine. If you just want to be friends that fuck then we’ll just be friends that fuck.” He gave Ijaz a small smile. “Whatever you’re comfortable with is okay for me. I won’t ask for more.”

Ijaz looked up at Jonathan. “I just want to keep edging,” he said softly. “I just want to keep edging like we’d planned.”

“Then we’ll keep edging,” agreed Jonathan. “We’ll keep going.”

The corners of Ijaz’s mouth twitched briefly. “Okay,” he said, taking a breath. “Okay.” He looked across to Jonathan’s lap, where Jonathan was hard. “Are you still going to come right now if I touch you?”

Jonathan huffed a small laugh. “Yeah. Pretty much.” He lay back down and Ijaz rolled over to face him. “How about you?” Jonathan’s lashes lowered as he looked down between them. “Are you up to being touched?”

“Yeah,” said Ijaz, taking Jonathan’s wrist and guiding Jonathan’s hand to his erection. “Touch me. I want you to.”

Jonathan hummed and curled his fingers around the flushed skin of Ijaz’s cock. “I can do that,” he murmured. “I can do that.”

Ijaz swallowed and then released Jonathan’s wrist to tug a pillow beneath both their heads. He breathed out and smoothed a hand from Jonathan’s shoulder down over the muscles there to Jonathan’s elbow.

Jonathan stalled his strokes for a second to shift his position slightly, throwing an ankle over Ijaz’s calf. “You can touch my balls if you like,” suggested Jonathan. “I can handle that, I think.”

“You sure?” asked Ijaz.

“Think so.” Jonathan started stroking Ijaz’s cock again. “I’ll tell you if it gets too much.”

Licking his lips, Ijaz did as requested, reaching a hand down to brush his fingertips over Jonathan’s balls, then cupping them in his hand.

“Bit harder,” said Jonathan, and Ijaz complied, his fingers beginning to knead and then gently tug at the skin.

“Yeah,” breathed Jonathan.

“You’re less sensitive than I am,” said Ijaz, his fingers working into a rhythm.

“With my balls?” asked Jonathan.

“With your balls,” agreed Ijaz, one corner of his mouth curling upwards.

Jonathan laughed. “Is this some kind of competition now? Will I get an award?”

Ijaz chuckled lightly. “A bollock award?”

“Why not?” said Jonathan. “Don’t you think I could win a bollock award?”

Ijaz flexed his back slightly, the light from the lamp glancing across his shoulder blades. “I don’t see why you should get it,” he said. “Surely the award should go to the most sensitive, not the least sensitive. I should get the bollock award.”

Jonathan snorted a laugh and Ijaz joined him.

“Would there be a ball-shaped trophy?” asked Jonathan.

“Of course,” said Ijaz, meeting Jonathan’s eye with a smile. “One golden bollock for the runner-up and two for the winner.”

“Fair enough.” Jonathan grinned and looked down to tighten his grip around Ijaz’s cock. “I’d be happy with a single-bollock trophy. I’d display it on my mantelpiece.”

Ijaz took a shuddery breath and grinned in return. “You don’t have a mantelpiece.”

“Tough shit.” Jonathan rocked his hips forward slightly. “You can touch my dick a bit if you like. At the base. Keep it at the base.”

“Okay.” Ijaz licked his lips and did as he was told, circling his forefinger and thumb around the base of Jonathan’s cock and stroking just slightly.

Jonathan took a deep breath and looked down between them to give Ijaz longer strokes, grazing the moist head with his palm.

Ijaz was breathing heavily. He swallowed. “Not so much.” The hand on Jonathan’s cock was shaking. “Not so much.”

“Okay,” said Jonathan, and instead changed to mirror the movement of Ijaz’s hand, curling his thumb and forefinger around the base of Ijaz’s cock and giving short strokes.

“You’re more sensitive than me all over,” said Jonathan.

Ijaz breathed out, face flushed. His eyes flicked up to Jonathan’s. “More trophies for me then.”

“Not fucking fair,” muttered Jonathan.

Ijaz grinned. “Don’t blame me. I don’t make the rules up.”

“Yes you did. You did just that.” Jonathan removed his hand from Ijaz’s cock to slap him on the arse.

Ijaz gasped and rolled over to chuckle into the pillow. “You bastard,” came Ijaz’s muffled voice.

“You want me to do it again?” asked Jonathan brightly.

“Fuck off,” muttered Ijaz.

Jonathan laughed and settled his half of the pillow more comfortably under his head. He looked at the line of Ijaz’s back. “Come on then,” said Jonathan. “Do you want to keep going? I was just getting into that.”

Ijaz turned his head to expose his flushed face. “It’s too much,” he said. “Can we just kiss, instead? I need to wind down a bit.”

Jonathan shrugged. “If you like.”

And so Ijaz rolled onto his back and Jonathan climbed half on top to kiss him, lips meeting lips and then Jonathan’s pink tongue pressing into Ijaz’s mouth. Ijaz made a soft noise in the back of his throat, lifting a hand to brush it lazily through Jonathan’s short hair.

Outside, the rain continued, quieter now, the bedroom curtains waving slightly and casting soft shadows across the walls.

One of Jonathan’s hands was cupping Ijaz’s jaw, and one of Ijaz’s hands was cradling the back of Jonathan’s head, a thumb brushing the edge of Jonathan’s ear. For a while the only noise in the room was that of lips and tongues and saliva.

Ijaz bent a leg at the knee, his foot dragging across the dark blue sheets and then running over the back of Jonathan’s calf. Jonathan breathed out heavily through his nose.

It wasn’t much longer before Jonathan was cupping Ijaz’s jaw with both hands and Ijaz was running one of his own hands across the dark skin of Jonathan’s back. Hips tilted, legs shifted, and then Jonathan pushed a thigh down between Ijaz’s.

Ijaz groaned into the kiss, his hips rising upwards. Jonathan rocked his own hips down and the slow slide of skin on skin rasped through the air.

They stayed like that for a time, both rolling their hips with small movements, cocks pressed against thighs and abdomens. It wasn’t long, though, before the tempo grew faster, and soon hips were rocking forcefully and backs were arching. Jonathan’s thighs glistened with sweat and the tips of Ijaz’s ears grew red.

Finally, the kiss broke as Ijaz dropped his head back onto the pillow, panting, one hand clutching at the slick skin at back of Jonathan’s neck. Jonathan hung his chin down over Ijaz’s shoulder, his mouth open and upper arms shivering with exertion as he rocked his hips faster. Ijaz moaned openly, followed quickly by Jonathan, the both of them gasping and flushed. The bedsprings creaked and then creaked again.

It was just as the toes on all four feet were curling and knuckles were clenching white, that Ijaz slapped a shaky hand against Jonathan’s back and said, “We have to stop.”

Jonathan looked at him dazedly, then rolled off until he was lying on his back on the bed, his chest heaving and shining with sweat.

“Oh fuck me,” panted Ijaz, running a palm over his sticky forehead. “I was really into that.”

Jonathan swallowed. “Yeah.”

For a few moments they lay still, staring at the ceiling and catching their breath. Then Ijaz rolled onto his side to tap Jonathan on the arm. “Hey,” said Ijaz, swallowing, “can you check your phone to see how long we’ve been going for?”

Jonathan nodded and flexed his back. Then he turned over towards the bedside table, misjudged the distance and rolled straight onto the carpet with a loud thud.

“Uh,” he groaned from the floor.

Ijaz scrambled onto all fours to peer over the side of the bed. His eyes were wide. “Hey, Jonathan, are you okay?”

Jonathan, lying in an ungainly sprawl on the floor, sniggered out a breathless laugh.

Ijaz sniggered in return and bit his lip. “Are you hurt?”

Jonathan laughed some more. “No. I…” He laughed again, looked up at Ijaz, then turned back to the carpet and laughed almost silently, his broad shoulders curled up and eyes squeezed shut.

Ijaz was laughing too. “Did that… Did that actually just happen?”

“I missed…” wheezed Jonathan. He gestured vaguely at the bedside table. “I mi… I… I…”

Ijaz’s shoulders were shaking. “God, you are such a dick.”

If anything, that just made Jonathan laugh harder. Tears were running down his cheeks. He wheezed silently.

Ijaz laughed some more then pushed himself back on his knees and wiped at his face. “Oh my God,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I hope that didn’t wake up your downstairs neighbours.”

Jonathan had started letting out quiet squeaks. “I can’t… fucking… believe…”

“Neither can I!” exclaimed Ijaz.

Down on the floor, Jonathan sounded like he was trying to catch his breath. “Oh God.” He wheezed some more, sitting up and leaning back against the wall, wide-eyed. “Oh God. Oh God.”

Ijaz grinned. “Are you done now?”

Jonathan took a deep breath and ran his hands over his head. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards. “Fucking hell.”

“Hey,” said Ijaz, “are you sure you didn’t hurt yourself?”

Jonathan bit his lip and patted down his sides. He laughed a little before closing his eyes and taking a slow, deliberate breath. “I think I’m fine,” he said, looking up, mouth curling up into a smile. “Doesn’t hurt too much now. Might have a bit of a bruise tomorrow though.”

“Such a dick,” mouthed Ijaz. He grinned at Jonathan. “Seriously. One minute you were there and the next I just heard this, ‘uh,’ from the floor!”

“Stop.” Jonathan was laughing again. “Oh, stop, or I’ll never breathe again.”

Laughing along, Ijaz reached down a hand and helped pull Jonathan back onto the bed.

“So what is the time, then?” asked Ijaz. He looked at Jonathan. “Actually, I don’t trust you to check any more.” Ijaz reached across to pick up Jonathan’s phone for himself.

The light from the screen lit up Ijaz’s face. “Hey,” he said, eyebrows rising, “we’ve been going for an hour; that’s not bad.”

Jonathan clambered up the bed until he was sitting against the headboard, still chuckling to himself, and still hard. “How long are we supposed to hold out for?” he asked.

“Like, about two hours?” said Ijaz. “Two hours would be good.”

“Oh, fuck me.” Jonathan pressed his palms into his eyes, but he was smiling. “You mean we’ve got to keep going for another hour?”

“‘Fraid so,” said Ijaz, smiling in return.

Jonathan groaned. “I’m beginning to worry that I’ll never be allowed to come again.”

“It’s only an hour,” said Ijaz.

Only an hour,” muttered Jonathan. He took a deep breath and then started laughing.

“Are you off again?” asked Ijaz

“Sorry,” mumbled Jonathan, still giggling. “Sorry. I can’t…” His shoulders shook.

Ijaz chuckled and gave Jonathan a slap to the knee. “Pull yourself together. Honestly.”

“Sorry sorry sorry,” said Jonathan. He rested his head back against the headboard and took several deep breaths, eyes closed.

Ijaz smoothed his palm over the knee he’d just hit. “Am I going to have to kiss you to calm you down?”

Jonathan opened an eye, smiling. “Maybe.” He bit his lip. “Might work.”

“Come on then.” Ijaz patted the mattress. “Lie down. I’m not going to do it sitting up.”

Jonathan took another deep breath and did as he was told, scooting down until he was lying on his side.

Ijaz lay down to face him. “Better?” asked Ijaz.

Jonathan smiled. “Not yet.”

Ijaz gave a smile in return and leaned across to kiss him.

Jonathan hummed and moved a leg to hook his ankle over Ijaz’s. He pulled back from the kiss. “Bit better.”

“Good,” said Ijaz. He looked down as he ran a hand over Jonathan’s waist. “Can I touch you?”

“Yeah,” agreed Jonathan, moving his own hand down to Ijaz’s hip. “And you?”

Ijaz nodded. “Yeah. I’m ready.” Reaching between them, Ijaz ghosted his fingers over Jonathan’s erection then curled them into a fist around it.

“Mm.” Jonathan’s eyes fluttered. He took up Ijaz’s own erection and stroked it.

Ijaz smiled, face flushed, and they kissed again, briefly.

“You feel good,” said Jonathan, looking down between them. “Your cock feels good.”

“Yeah,” said Ijaz, following Jonathan’s gaze. “You too.”

Jonathan pursed his lips. He continued watching as he tightened his grip on Ijaz’s cock and Ijaz’s cock jumped in return. “Do you think we should use lube?”

“Fuck, no.” Ijaz leaned across to kiss Jonathan’s jaw and run his tongue along it. “I will come so quick if we use lube.”

Jonathan groaned. “I’d like that though. I’d like to see that.”

“Fuck it,” said Ijaz, taking a shaky breath. He looked down as he twisted his fingers around the base of Jonathan’s cock; it was flushed and hard, the moist head exposed.

“We’re going to have to stop again soon anyway,” breathed Jonathan, rocking his hips. “I’m too worked up. Not going to be long before I get close.”

“Fuck it,” said Ijaz again. “Fuck.” He took a deep breath through his nose and bit his lip, his face growing darker. After a moment he looked up and said, “Maybe we should just keep going.”

Jonathan stopped the movement of his hand and his lashes lowered briefly before he met Ijaz’s gaze. “You mean: come now?”

“Yeah.” Ijaz let his hand stray away from Jonathan’s cock and up over Jonathan’s waist. He gave Jonathan a flushed smile. “Yeah, let’s come now.”

Jonathan licked his lips. “It hasn’t been two hours yet though,” he murmured.

“An hour’s good though, isn’t it?” said Ijaz. “We at least did that.” His eyes fluttered down to Jonathan’s cock then back up again. “We’ll make it to two hours next time.”

Jonathan grinned at him. “Next time?”

“Yeah.” Ijaz smiled. “Two hours next time and three hours the time after.”

Jonathan chuckled. “You actually want to kill me, don’t you?”

“Just teaching you willpower.” Ijaz encircled both his hands around Jonathan’s cock and started stroking quickly. “Let’s come then. Let’s come together.”

Jonathan groaned. “I can do that,” he said, leaning forward to kiss Ijaz briefly as he made a fist around Ijaz’s cock again. “I can so do that.”

Ijaz took a deep breath and looked down, both his hands twisting over the hard length of Jonathan’s cock. Jonathan, meanwhile, was using one hand on Ijaz’s cock to focus short strokes over the flushed head. A bead of moisture dripped down from the tip of Ijaz’s cock to glisten against the dark sheets.

“Oh God.” Ijaz’s shoulders shuddered. He watched their hands. “I’ve wanted to come for so long.”

“Me too.” Jonathan swallowed, his breath hitching as Ijaz upped the pace of his strokes. “God, that’s good,” Jonathan breathed. “Really good.”

Ijaz nodded shakily and stroked his foot up Jonathan’s shin. Jonathan hissed and slowed the next stroke of his hand, his thumb trembling over the tip of Ijaz’s cock.

“Fuck,” spat Ijaz, toes curling, and reaching down with one hand to knead Jonathan’s balls. “Fuck.”

Jonathan panted, his back arching as he started to roll his hips, his cock pushing through Ijaz’s fingers. “Yeah.” He kissed Ijaz again before pulling back. His hand on Ijaz’s cock was shaking. “I’m nearly there,” he whispered hurriedly. “I’m nearly fucking there.”

“Yes,” hissed Ijaz, swallowing jerkily, lips damp. “Yes. Do it. Fuck. Do it.”

“Oh fuck.” Jonathan’s chest heaved and his thighs tensed. His face was flushed as he pressed it down against the sheets. “Fuck, Ijaz.” His shoulders trembled. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I could fall for you.” Jonathan swallowed and gasped for air. “I could really fucking fall for you.”

“Fuck,” panted Ijaz, face flushed. His whole body shook. “Fuck, Jonathan. Fuck.” Ijaz’s feet scrabbled against the sheets and his hips jerked forwards. “Oh shit,” he gasped as his cock pulsed out between them. “I… Fuck.” He threw his head back, limbs shuddering and hips rolling, semen hitting his chest and neck.

Jonathan groaned as his fingers smeared Ijaz’s cock white. Ijaz’s hands on Jonathan had stopped stroking, but Jonathan reached one of his own hands down, his thumb brushing the slick head of his cock and then he was coming too, out onto the sheets between them in thick, white lines.

“Fuck,” gasped Ijaz, taking desperate breaths as his cock pulsed a few final times, the spurts landing to glisten on his stomach. “Fucking hell. Fuck.”

Beside him, Jonathan was shuddering, biting his lip and hips rocking as he ejaculated over the sheets. Finally, with a strangled noise, he stilled and collapsed down against the bed, flushed and sweating all over, chest heaving with every breath.

“Fuck me,” said Ijaz. He raised himself shakily on an elbow and surveyed the mess between them before collapsing down onto his back. “I have never come that hard.” Ijaz ran a hand over his flushed face. “I feel like I could fucking pass out.”

Jonathan laughed breathlessly into the mattress. “Not surprised,” he said, voice muffled. “I’ve never seen you come that much before.”

“And what about you?” Ijaz chuckled, squirming uncomfortably. “I think you’ve actually ruined your sheets. I didn’t know you had that much come in you.”

Jonathan turned to him, eyes crinkling at the corners. “It felt fucking amazing.”

“So good,” agreed Ijaz, sitting up woozily. “So fucking good. Looked good too.”

Jonathan grinned at him. “Yeah?”

“Fuck yeah,” said Ijaz, leaning back against the headboard. “We are definitely doing that agai–” He turned to look beside him. “There’s fucking spunk on your headboard, man.”

Jonathan laughed some more, sitting up slowly and crossing his legs. “That was you,” he said to Ijaz. “That was fucking you. Didn’t you notice?”

“Fuck me,” said Ijaz, looking at it with wide eyes. “I’ve never managed that before.”

Jonathan grinned, rubbing a palm over Ijaz’s ankle. “That’s a new record we’ll have to beat,” he said, “when we go for two hours.”

“Yeah.” Ijaz flashed him a bright smile. “Hell yeah.” Then, yawning, Ijaz lifted up his arms and stretched out his back. “Do you have anything to clean up this mess?” he asked, glancing at Jonathan. “Because it’s fucking disgusting.”

Jonathan laughed, got off the bed, and stumbled his way over to his chest of drawers to pull out two small towels. He threw one of them to Ijaz and they spent the next few minutes wiping down the bed and themselves.

When they were done, and when they’d both made brief trips to the bathroom, they lay down together on the clean side of the bed and Jonathan pulled up the covers.

Ijaz gave Jonathan a smile and leaned across to kiss him on the lips, running his hand up Jonathan’s arm to his shoulder. Jonathan kissed him in return, then pulled back to lay his head on the pillow.

“Let’s do it,” said Ijaz.

Jonathan yawned. “Two hours next time?”

“No, you idiot.” Ijaz laughed. “Let’s start dating.”

Jonathan’s shoulders went stiff. “What?” He lifted his head, face flushed, to look at Ijaz. “You–”

“Let’s start dating,” repeated Ijaz. “You said you wanted to, right? So let’s do it.”

Jonathan’s eyes were wide. “But you don’t want to,” he said. “I’m pretty sure you said that you don’t want to.”

Ijaz shrugged. “I changed my mind. After all,” he said, “we already hang out a lot and have sex. The only thing left to do is make it official.”

“Yeah,” Jonathan frowned at him, “but you were definitely not okay with that last part when we talked about it earlier.”

“Well, maybe I’ve decided to stop being such a fucking coward,” said Ijaz. He opened his mouth to say more, but it was covered suddenly by Jonathan’s palm.

Jonathan grinned at him. “I know what it is.” He removed his hand and pushed at Ijaz’s shoulder. “You’ve come too hard.”

Ijaz’s brows quirked. “You think I’ve jizzed my brains out over your bed?”

“I think,” said Jonathan, smiling, “that you are running fucking high on endorphins right now.”

Ijaz shrugged and smiled in return. “Maybe I am.”

“Well then,” said Jonathan. “I say: no. We shouldn’t start dating.”

“What?” Ijaz frowned. “Why not?”

“Because,” said Jonathan, “you are going to freak the fuck out when you finally come back down to earth in the morning.”

Ijaz laughed at him. “I am not going to change my mind. I’ve thought about it.”

“Yeah. Okay,” scoffed Jonathan, closing his eyes and burrowing down beneath the covers.

“No. I mean it,” said Ijaz, watching him. “I am not going to change my mind on this one.”

Jonathan raised his eyebrows and looked at him. “Really?”

“Really,” said Ijaz.

Jonathan’s face flushed again. He huffed. “Fine then. But I’m not going to agree to anything now. If you still want to start dating in the morning, then we’ll start dating.” He held Ijaz’s gaze. “But if you don’t want to, then we can keep things as they are; that’s cool too.”

“I am seriously not going to change my mind.” Ijaz scooted down the bed until he could kiss Jonathan briefly on the lips. “I am going to ask you out tomorrow morning and then we’re going to start dating.”

Jonathan smiled at him. “You do that then.”

“I will.” Ijaz draped an arm over Jonathan’s waist. “I will do just that.”

Jonathan just shrugged.

“Oh, you are such a dick.” Ijaz laughed and slapped Jonathan’s hip.

Jonathan chuckled in return. “Yeah I am,” he said, settling his head on the pillow and closing his eyes. “Tough shit.”

See this piece’s entry on the Shousetsu Bang*Bang wiki.

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