by Saru no Neko<\/p>\n
(mirrors http:\/\/s2b2.livejournal.com\/263440.html<\/a>)<\/p>\n Though for him there was no escape from the heavy brand of geekery, Brian \u201cBrain\u201d Jackson considered himself, despite his alphabetically organized music and societally abnormal fascination in fish, to be nearer to the \u201ccool\u201d side of the spectrum than not. For one, he wore his sweater-vests ironically. For two, more than once had an undergrad\u2019s fragile freshman eyes gone wide and round and wet as she or he tried to pull him from the path of propriety, to win his love, his lust, his body, and perhaps a good grade in the lectures he TA\u2019ed. Yet it\u2019s pretty common knowledge that a GPA romance only will carry flirtation so far. There\u2019s got to be a chemical component as well — a bodily attraction that outdistances the scholastic for most college-age youth to try and make bodies hit bed, and to sulk when all goes wrong. What this means is that it was not just for the grades semi-subtle seduction was attempted. Brain, despite it all, was a good looking guy.<\/p>\n This is the truth of it. Maybe you\u2019ve heard some folks say that humans begin to resemble what they work with, just like people begin to look like their spouses, their dogs, or their favorite pair of pants. Yet Brain had loved fish since his first county-fair guppy and he looked no more like a fish than the average proctologist resembles an anus. Sure, he had a swimmer\u2019s build, but a human swimmer\u2019s build, with broad shoulders and thin waist. His complexion was just a few shades past creamy coffee, just a bit darker than his great-grandma Jolissa, who had passed for white, become a Harvey girl and moved the family out West. She had been beautiful, and honestly, so was he, though sometimes that\u2019s not considered a compliment for a modern male. Still, while his looks cemented his popularity in the undergraduate sphere, he\u2019d yet to give his heart to anyone.<\/p>\n The problem with people, he often saw, was that they lacked the proper lateral lines, gills, scales and swim bladders that put fascination in fish. The minds of men may be mystifying; the heads of women, closed books; yet fish are the final frontier of mystery. Fish are a glimpse of a different reality.<\/p>\n What secrets might scientists reveal with a closer inspection of fish lives? It was possible Utopia existed, but that humanity was just moving through the wrong element to discover it. Yet here was Man, the great upright ape, wrecking both land and sea — crushing the opportunity to discover truths humankind\u2019s greatest dreamers could not even begin to form. Yet it was not the destiny of mankind to play Azrael to the planet. The fish would not remain passive to the bitter, bitter end. Someday soon, in a last-ditch effort to spread their perfect politics to the land-swimmers, the fish were going to come to shore.<\/p>\n <\/a>Brain mentioned this idea to a bonfire circle of friends, though only a few were listening — tawny Bianca, and crazy-eyed Jeff, and a guy he\u2019d not been introduced to yet, who strummed a steel stringed guitar and pulled from its neck blues-soulful sounds. Bianca and Jeff laughed at him, in the nicest possible of ways. The guitar guy created a sorrowful, bluesy little tune that Brain soon realized was a jazzed up version of The Twilight Zone theme.<\/p>\n They were talking about mysteries, myths and legends, mostly of the sort that makes skin creep and goose pimples rise — perfect stories for a camping trip on the Oregon coast. The night was cool and damp around them, the fire full of the heat of life. With the ocean to one side and the mossy old forest of the Pacific Northwest on the other it was like being surrounded by possibilities. Possibilities with eyeballs.<\/p>\n Now, there was a third reason that Brain had not yet broken the proverbial whale shark\u2019s back and fallen into the realm of dorkitude: he did have friends — and friends with interests other than fish. Friends who pulled him out of his small roommate infested apartment for things other than \u201cBiology Club Frog Finds\u201d and the occasional swing-dance event at Mo\u2019s Diner. Friends who brought him to parties to be the necessary more-sober-than-the-majority attendee who organized crazy games of Strip-Scrabble (\u2018More Fun When You\u2019re Drunk\u2019 \u2122) and commenced in slaughtering all on-comers. Friends who actually cared whether he spent his summer weekends in the lab analyzing the fishy grunts of Onchorhynchus mykiss<\/i>, or not. Friends who particularly cared if that forty-eight hour weekend was spent without eating, sleeping, and, especially, bathing. Friends who, when seeing young Brain prepared to settle down for a couple of days of exhausting fishy bliss, were friendly enough to forcibly kidnap him–camping supplies, a change of underwear, and fishing rod in tow — and bring him to a cold, damp Oregon beach, to ply him with beer and fire-baked potatoes until happiness and contentment were impossible to ignore. In other words, friends like Bianca, Jeff, and Jim.<\/p>\n Jim sat across the campfire, commanding the attention of the three other ladies present with the tale of his epic adventure on the 215-mile John Muir Trail, leaving out the part where, back in the city, he burned his boots and swore never to eat dehydrated, freeze-dried food again. He was of the sort that likes the title of \u2018outdoorsman\u2019 more than the actual outdoors, but his collection of the latest gear meant that for these under-sky soirees he enjoyed arranging, little had to be borrowed from the university\u2019s recreation department.<\/p>\n Grinning at Jim across the campfire, Brain settled back into his low camp chair, and continued his exposition. \u201cNow listen here: so, I\u2019m talking over-the-top. So I\u2019m talking the stuff of the craziest science-fiction. So I\u2019m making the SciFi Channel look like Jim\u2019s cute old granduncle, instead of the Cape Pleasant Moth Man. But seriously, we do not know! Can we really deny that there is culture below the sea? There is more, Horatio, Doubters and Mockers, between Heaven and Earth, and even Sea, than is in your philosophy!\u201d<\/p>\n Bianca\u2019s fist collided with Brain\u2019s arm, sloshing his beer. \u201cPretension Punch! Danger, Will Robinson!\u201d<\/p>\n Crazy-eyed Jeff leaned across his girlfriend\u2019s lap towards Brain, a sort of coyote grin on his face, mismatched eyes dancing in the firelight. \u201cHey, you\u2019re a fish-man, man! Someday you\u2019ll just vanish into the sea, right, and it\u2019ll be like, that\u2019s it. Bloop — you\u2019re a fish!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAnd you\u2019re shit-faced.\u201d Bianca righted the man drooping across her lap and handed him a buttered spud. \u201cHere, eat another potato, and give me that beer.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, seriously!\u201d As half of Jeff\u2019s beer spilled in the exchange, he gestured wildly with his potato. \u201cYou\u2019ll be like Aquaman, but real!\u201d He leaned over Bianca again, getting into Brain\u2019s face. \u201cBray-Bray… Dude<\/i>… You could, like, talk to fish<\/i>…\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cDude,\u201d the guitar guy interjected, speaking for the first time of the evening, for the first time that Brain remembered. His light, friendly voice had a sandpaper edge to it, \u201cSorry to break it to you, but Aquaman is lame<\/i>.\u201d<\/p>\n Eyes still cast down to the strings of his guitar, the song he now pulled out may have been \u201cThe Walking Blues\u201d, but it clung more at memory, pulled more at the heart than Brain had ever heard \u201cThe Walking Blues\u201d do before, and echoed the roar and hush of the sea. The guitarist\u2019s hair was gold-ruddy in the fire\u2019s cast, his nose quite long. When he looked up, flames flickered in eyes too dark to determine the color of. Meeting those eyes — black, black, like city night — Brain looked away. He\u2019d been surprised — the guy was more hawkish than handsome, and still something about him stirred in Brain like the shadow of a memory, making him feel as warm and melty as a s\u2019more\u2019s marshmallow.<\/p>\n \u201cHey man!\u201d said Jeff, leaning even further across Bianca, and gesturing with his potato. \u201cYou just, like, dissed my best friend!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah!\u201d When Bianca chimed in, Brain rolled his eyes to the sky. \u201cYou just, like, insulted Bray-Bray\u2019s very existence! Do you not know that right down to his super-hero undies, Brian, Brain, \u201cBray-Bray\u201d Jackson, desires, nay, conspires<\/i> to be the next, the greatest, Aquaman that has ever doggy-paddled the Seven Seas?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve never, in my entire existence, ever, wanted to be Aquaman.\u201d<\/p>\n Jeff whooped. \u201cDenial is not just a river in Egypt! Jim, man, listen! Bray-Bray says he doesn\u2019t want to be Aquaman!\u201d<\/p>\n Jim looked over the fire, putting on a look of mocking shock. \u201cMy god, Brain! Wake up and smell the coffee! You do realize that for the past few years you\u2019ve spent the grand majority of your time trying to discover a way to communicate with fish? In their native tongue?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s Aquaman, Bray-Bray.\u201d<\/p>\n Bianca joined in, \u201cAnd that your dreams, once that project has been completed, focus on creating some sort of apparatus that may allow people to process water-oxygen into breathable air?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAquaman!\u201d Jeff crowed.<\/p>\n \u201cIt doesn\u2019t that when you\u2019re not deciphering your average rainbow trout\u2019s grunts, eating, sleeping, grading, or teaching, you swim. Perhaps it cannot be said that you possess \u2018tremendous swimming prowess,\u2019 but…\u201d Jim turned to the blank faces of those not used to the group\u2019s antics– the three girls he had been wooing with his tales of Wildman lore, and the guitar guy whose irrepressible grin was turned on his steel strings. \u201cFolks, if you couldn\u2019t tell, Brain here is an undeniable geek.\u201d<\/p>\n Extending a middle finger, Brain said, \u201cTo which the only proper reply is, \u2018fuck you\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n Jim grinned, \u201cThanks for the offer, but I prefer women.\u201d<\/p>\n Bianca patted Brain\u2019s shoulder, \u201cBrain, you walked into that one.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSwam into it. Swam into it like a fish<\/i>.\u201d Concluded Jeff.<\/p>\n \u201cBad. No biscuit.\u201d Bianca was still giggly, though winding down at last. \u201cBut really, you know, about fish people…\u201d incessant chortle completed, the laugh remained in her voice, \u201cThere\u2019s this story I really like, and this is the right part of the world for it too. Bray-Bray, have you ever heard that your fish might actually have been human once?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cFairytale.\u201d said Brain, somewhat dismissively.<\/p>\n \u201cNot a \u2018fairytale\u2019. Boy, you\u2019ve known me for five years. I study folklore, not fairytales, and not common-tongue cures for the equally common cold!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMmmhm,\u201d said Brain. Brain and Jeff\u2019s eyes met, and Jeff pulled a face.<\/p>\n \u201cAlright, so, I do sometimes find myself studying the folk-cures of folklore, but this story isn\u2019t about all that. It\u2019s an origin myth. C\u2019mon guys, I don\u2019t need to tell it.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019d like to hear your story, Bianca.\u201d said the blond girl to Jim\u2019s left, saccharine–but by then everyone was listening, their eyes all resting on Bianca.<\/p>\n \u201cOkay… The way I know it makes it a short story to tell.\u201d With no more prompting, Bianca\u2019s tawny voice settled into its storyteller cant. \u201cBack in a time, a long age ago, there came a famine period for the people that lived on the breast of the sea. They were a people that lived on the salt-water lives of the mussels and the fish, and the different types of sea vegetable. But suddenly, one day, it was all gone. The sea which had always been so plentiful was as empty as the women\u2019s collecting baskets. The people were at a loss for what to do. So they gathered together, they consulted, they considered. At last it was clear, there was no other option; half of the people were to give themselves so that the others may live.<\/p>\n \u201cSo one by one the men and women and children of the people were divided in half, and when it was decided who would go, who would stay, there were no goodbyes. Those that were to leave turned away from the village and walked straight into the ocean brine. All was silent, but for the waves sucking at the feet of the people, then lapping at the knees of the people, then rocking against the waists of the people, then closing, quietly over their heads. The world was silent.<\/p>\n \u201cThen suddenly, like a symphony of silver, scaled backs churned the water! Huge fish practically beached themselves on the land! The people that remained rushed to get their fishing gear. There were fish everywhere! Enough fish that the people that remained would have to be crazy not to have enough to survive! For days they smoked and salted and saved the rich pink flesh of the silver-backed fish, until at last the flurry subsided, the spawning was done.<\/p>\n \u201cI will tell you now, though; the people that remained had thought that once was it. Even though the initial sacrifice was great, they believed that only once would the people that went into the sea be able to help them. So imagine their surprise the next year seeing the silver backs of the ones who left, returning to the spot they had first come to be, as they would for all the years then on, on into the future, on into lore.\u201d<\/p>\n Bianca story was short–couldn\u2019t have taken more than a couple of minutes to tell, artistic pauses and all–but she had a beautiful voice. With her voice storytelling it didn\u2019t always matter what she was saying, more just that she was saying it. Sure enough this time, when the last words of her story vanished into the night, swallowed by the forest, dispelled by the sea\u2019s changing waves, even the guitar\u2019s strings were silent. Mostly. Another little tune was soon pulled out following the echoes of her words. The guitar guy was grinning again.<\/p>\n \u201cOh, Bianca!\u201d cried the pixie-faced girl sitting next to the guitar guy at Jim\u2019s right, \u201cDo you do that professionally?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cGet strong men and tough women to shut up for minutes at a time? Oh yes. It\u2019s a hard job in this day and age, but someone\u2019s got to do it.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, you tell stories, right?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNah, I bartend and listen to other people talk.\u201d Bianca laughed.<\/p>\n A chuckle spread around the circle and then, again, silence stretched a few moments thin as people lost themselves in their own considerations. Brain wondered at what the sight of sky from the ocean floor might feel like unhampered by the weights of underwater humanity–the scuba gear, the wetsuits, and the ever-present caution that comes from being outside your natural element. He longed for it.<\/p>\n Conversations, erupting as if by consensus– all at once and all too complicated– broke the circle\u2019s silence. The dark-haired girl talked eagerly, albeit quietly, with Bianca and Jeff. Bianca leaned over Jeff to catch the girl\u2019s words, and laughed at what she said. The two women to the right and left of Jim chattered away, Jim leaning back like a lion and interjecting an occasional thought.<\/p>\n Brain might normally have enjoyed watching the interactions around the fire, but now his mind was far away and deep in the Pacific Ocean, considering the creatures still unknown to mankind and bioluminescence like stars in the dark–the act of seeing without the isolation of an ROV, a submarine or scuba gear. Lost in thought, feeling low, wistful, Brain\u2019s mind drifted among the fragile creatures of the deep, thinking about how easily humans can upset an ecosystem\u2019s balance, wondering what role a sudden influx of Bianca\u2019s fish-people could play in the delicate schemes and systems of the intertidal zone. The only other person silent in the rich, cool night was the guitar guy. At the moment even the guitar\u2019s steel strings were still.<\/p>\n Jim interrupted Brain\u2019s thoughts. \u201cKarol!\u201d he shouted, \u201cKarol!\u201d It took Brain a moment to realize the one Jim was talking to was not one of the unnamed ladies, but the guitar player at his side.<\/p>\n \u201cHello!\u201d Karol\u2019s head jerked up, and he smiled at Jim.<\/p>\n \u201cTell us that story your mom would tell. That one about the Polish mermaid.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut Jim, you\u2019re so much wordier. You tell it so much better.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s your mom\u2019s story.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s Poland\u2019s story, but hey, you can tell it.\u201d<\/p>\n Jim didn\u2019t need much more convincing than that, his brash voice booming, \u201cMy aunt tells this the best,\u201d as he broke into the tale, speaking to the girls on either side.<\/p>\n The guy named Karol turned his shaggy golden head to Brain. \u201cSo, I didn\u2019t mean to insult your very existence there earlier.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhuh?\u201d asked Brain eloquently, now too busy considering the play of fire and shadow on tanned skin to notice that the comment was directed at him.<\/p>\n Karol\u2019s teeth flashed in the ruddy light. \u201cI\u2019d no clue you were aspiring to wear the scaled undies of Aquaman. I\u2019d not said anything if I\u2019d known.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh. I\u2019m not.\u201d Brain ducked his head, \u201cWell, I mean, not really. No desire to try on the \u2018undies\u2019, you know. But I\u2019m an easy enough target for this group, so… Um… Karol, right?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah. You missed the introductions earlier, yeah? That one, Bianca, said something about a \u2018bathroom emergency\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cShe\u2019d sat on me for two hours straight! I think just fifteen minutes would have been enough, you know, to bring the car up to speed where I\u2019d not tried to jump, but no. Two hours straight!\u201d And Brain knew it sounded awkward, knew it\u2019s a \u201cgeek-boy and friends\u201d thing to have said, but the guitar guy smoothed it over.<\/p>\n \u201cHa! You might have to tell that one some time. So… Brian, right?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, that or Brain. Not to seem pretentious…\u201d he cast a nervous eye to his right, where Bianca was talking with an intense expression on her face and made a face, \u201cBianca came up with it back when we met, and it\u2019s what most people call me now.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhat about \u2018Bray-Bray\u2019?\u201d asked the grinning Karol.<\/p>\n \u201cAugh. That\u2019s just the devolution of a name. Jeff did it. I tell you, you introduce your engineer friend to your linguist-slash-anthropologist buddy, they start dating, and then they spend the rest of their time trying to ruin your reputation in revenge. You know.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cCan\u2019t say I do, really. Sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, um… It\u2019s probably sort of a unique situation. Typically introducing an engineer to an anthropologist is like introducing oil to fire. Or putting two male betta fish in the same tank. You know, not a good idea.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHow about introducing a fish studier to a former fish fillet-er? Is that a better combo?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cUm.\u201d Brain shook his head and smiled. \u201cSo have you worked as a fish fillet-er?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAs a fish gutter at least. When I was living up in Alaska I did.\u201d And he changed the topic again. \u201cSo, are you really trying to learn the languages of fish?\u201d<\/p>\n Brain grinning, looked down and ran a hand through his short, curly hair. \u201cYeah, well, sort of. My elevator speech has it that I\u2019m studying the communication styles of saltwater\/freshwater bony fish–specifically, at the moment, rainbow trout– and their responses to environmental stimuli. I\u2019m hopeful that this research will offer insight into how both communication systems–and methods of learning–evolved below water.<\/p>\n \u201cBut here… Now, with fish, we won\u2019t be able to communicate like Aquaman. Our words won\u2019t directly, smoothly translate from one language to another, but hell, we\u2019ve got to remember that more than communicating outside of our species, we would be talking to something with a different genus, family, order, even class<\/i>, for heaven\u2019s sake! Communication happens in a lot of different ways. And even human languages are not smoothly translatable from one to the other, as Bianca keeps reminding me.<\/p>\n \u201cAnd here\u2019s one more benefit: we\u2019ve got wealth beneath the seas– not just like minerals and oil and all that stuff we generally put a dollar sign on, but in diversity itself. With something like thirty million creatures out there, left to be described, and only something point four million creatures already known, we\u2019ve got to find some way to enumerate their value– this delicate life, this great, undiscovered ocean of potential. How else can we protect it?\u201d<\/p>\n Then he caught sight of Karol\u2019s face, and he settled down sheepishly. Karol didn\u2019t look bored, not in the least, but as he rested forearms on the drum belly of his instrument, lips curled into a little smile, leaning slightly towards Brain and his enthusiasm, it was clear that Brain\u2019s words were not all that he was interested in. Brain blushed again, though that was probably lost to the night, to the firelight and his own dark skin.<\/p>\n \u201cHey, man,\u201d Said Karol, rocking forward, smiling. \u201cDon\u2019t settle down yet. How much have you been working on this other thing? The \u2018apparatus\u2019 that Bianca mentioned?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAh, um, well… That\u2019s not really anything. It\u2019s a day-dream, a pipe-dream.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah? Try me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019d like to find a way to let humans process oxygen like fish do, maybe. But mostly that\u2019s just me, being ridiculous. I\u2019d like a way to live underwater.\u201d<\/p>\n Karol was staring at the fire, his face pensive. Brain worried. He knew he was a bit weird. Some people thought him rather hugely weird. However, he did not want Karol to be among those people that did. So instead, in the silence between them he opened his ears to Bianca\u2019s conversation and tried to find a moment to add a comment that might cover his social slip. However Karol spoke before Brain could find his moment.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019d you think of Bianca\u2019s story?\u201d Karol asked.<\/p>\n Brain snorted in derision and relief. \u201cIf only.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIf only what?\u201d Prompted Karol. \u201cIf only you had her large hair and way of speaking?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve got to say, if I had hair like hers I\u2019d be hard-pressed to use it for the powers of good. . No, what I really mean is, if only there was truth in her stories. Instead it\u2019s like as we listen we delude ourselves with their reality. She\u2019s too good a story-teller. I want, really too much, to believe in stories, in magic, that might have me laughed out of the scientific community.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAnd this from the guy who quotes Hamlet.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain grinned at Karol\u2019s tone. \u201cThen what do you believe? Is there some sort of validity in it? How far should I allow my credulity to carry me?\u201d<\/p>\n Karol was silent, pensive. His fingers strummed across his strings once, a chord, and then struck up a jazzy little composition. \u201cI agree with you. Not about what you just said, but what you were talking about earlier. It seems to me you do consider that there are a lot of black boxes that still ought to be searched before science can claim it knows everything there is to know. I think you believe there\u2019s room for the unlikely to happen, yeah?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSure,\u201d said Brain.<\/p>\n \u201cSo with trenches going down into dark infinity, and ocean peaks larger than Everest, and thousands of miles of caves yet to be explored, and rainforests with hundreds of thousands of mostly unknown insectoid-lives, do we have all we need to know to deny the existence of magic?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cComparing myth and legend to the laws of physics and the theory of evolution, to testable, repeatable processes and science, yeah.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHey man,\u201d Karol reached over and ran calloused fingertips down Brain\u2019s wrist. \u201cSome laws are made to be broken, yeah?\u201d And he plucked the half-empty beer bottle from Brain\u2019s hands, downing it in one long swig.<\/p>\n \u201cWait, you\u2019re not underage are you?\u201d Brain asked dubiously as the meaning of Karol\u2019s words struck him.<\/p>\n \u201cHa! That\u2019d be funny.\u201d Karol carelessly plunked the bottle down in the sand by Brain\u2019s feet and looked up through his eyelashes.<\/p>\n As Brain\u2019s brain back-pedaled furiously, Karol laughed open-mouthed. \u201cAll I meant,\u201d he continued, leaning over his guitar strings once more, \u201cis that you know that Polish mermaid story Jim was going on about?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, definitely.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMy family\u2019s said to be descended from her.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain stared at the guy next to him, and laughed. \u201cBut you can\u2019t believe that!\u201d<\/p>\n Karol gave an expansive shrug, a smile tugging on the corners of his mouth as he tried and failed to keep his face stony. \u201cThat\u2019s the story. Great-great-great-grandma Syrenka met great-great-great-grandpa Fisherman, and my family is the end result.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThis character has a name?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, but it\u2019s Polish for ‘mermaid’.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWait, your, I can\u2019t say what, great-grandfather was human, though?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSo the story goes.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHow does that even work?\u201d<\/p>\n Karol rocked back, his expression wide and shocked, \u201cGross, man! How often do you think about your ancestors getting it on?\u201d<\/p>\n Brain laughed again, deeply. \u201cI get it. But the black sheep of your family is half fish, and Jim\u2019s not crowing it from the rooftops? Whose neck did you stick a knife to for that?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt helps that it\u2019s not a story he knows. Jim\u2019s not half the Pole I am, literally. We\u2019re cousins on my dad\u2019s side, and the old stories Mom\u2019s shared with him are a bit more traditional.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAnd so you pass the less traditional ones on to me. Share a beer,\u201d Brain raised the empty bottle from the sand, \u201cand a campfire with a guy and you\u2019re closer than cousins.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHey dude, it\u2019s easy to see your mouth is narrower than Jim\u2019s. I\u2019m guessing you\u2019ve not had nearly as much practice with putting your foot in it. Besides, it\u2019s not like you believe what I\u2019m saying; I\u2019m guessing these old family secrets,\u201d he chuckled, \u201cwill be safe with you.\u201d<\/p>\n Karol continued, looking up at the night sky above them, \u201cAnd yeah, and maybe, despite how little I know you, I guessed you\u2019d not judge. I\u2019ve got the feeling that you might actually like me better for being part fish.\u201d<\/p>\n They sat in companionable silence for some long minutes, staring at the ember-jeweled logs that remained of the bonfire. Around them the conversation began to die off, yawns taking its place. It was well past midnight. Brain shifted in his beach chair, missing the fire\u2019s size as the cold of the night began creeping towards his front. He gave a jerk towards Karol as, on his other side, Bianca stood suddenly. \u201cWhelp, kiddos,\u201d she said, pulling on Jeff\u2019s hand, \u201cWe\u2019re off to bed. We\u2019ll take the blue tent, the girls will get the grey one, and you guys,\u201d she nodded at Brain, Karol and Jim, \u201ccan take the orange one.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh, like that\u2019s fair! Why do the girls get the biggest tent? We\u2019re the ones with longer legs.\u201d asked Jim. The blonde threw sand at him and grinned, eyes squinting through thick eyelashes.<\/p>\n Bianca replied over her shoulder as she and Jeff walked off, Jeff\u2019s arm looped around her waist, \u201cI\u2019m no mom. If it bothers you so much, arm-wrestle for it.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI sort of doubt Jim will be sharing a tent with us tonight,,\u201d whispered Brain, leaning over to Karol.<\/p>\n Soon Jim departed, a girl under each arm, and then the quiet dark-haired girl pulled from her backpack a bivy shelter, which she set up out of the circle of light cast by the dying fire, away from the other tents. Still Brain and Karol sat at the fireside.<\/p>\n \u201cYou asked me what I thought about Bianca\u2019s stories.\u201d Brain broke the silence at last, voicing long-unspoken thoughts in a rough-edged voice. He was a bit tipsy, having drunk two and a half beers, which was a beer and a half more than normal. It was nothing extreme but it softened the edges of the night, made him want to smudge his aura on someone else\u2019s. \u201cI\u2019d like to see the world as a fish, brought beneath the waves. I\u2019d like to look up and see ocean so far overhead it created a dome, like the sky. I\u2019d like to explore the great kelp beds. It might be cool to be a fish.<\/p>\n \u201cI understand your great-whatever grandfather. He was a fisherman, yeah, but I imagine that fishing wasn\u2019t just a job for him. He gave his life to the sea, and so it was only right that he give his heart to the physical embodiment of the waves–the mermaid, right. And all along he knew that he could not share her world, couldn\u2019t see all the wonders below the water, wouldn\u2019t know that world of unknown dimension and depth, where light is… protoplasmic<\/i>, and there are monsters still in the living world… But…\u201d<\/p>\n Karol pulled his battered black cardboard guitar case out from behind himself, and clicked open the clasps to put his instrument away, grinning. Then, closing the case, he spoke, \u201cYou know dude, nothing but, like, unicorns and dragons are more mystical and woo-woo than mermaids. They\u2019ve got magic, man! If great-great-great-grandpa wanted to see that shit, I doubt Grandma Syrenka would\u2019ve let something like him not being able to breathe underwater get in the way. She\u2019d have figured it out. And he would have seen what you\u2019re talking about.\u201d Karol stood and stretched before picking up the guitar case and heading to the tent. \u201cMermaids are awesome, man.\u201d he called back to the seated Brain, \u201cHave some faith in their abilities!\u201d<\/p>\n He went outside without doing more than pulling on his Uni hoodie and goose bumps immediately pimpled his bare, pale legs sticking out below red plaid boxers. The night was preternaturally clear, the three-quarters full moon somehow lighting up the campsite like silver day. A slight breeze had struck up, blowing in warmer air from the sea, but still he shivered. There was more than waves on the wind; in every in-drawn breath of the sea, Brain could hear the tones of a steel-stringed guitar.<\/p>\n Trying to convince himself he wasn\u2019t stalking anyone, Brain wandered down from the campground, towards the music. He couldn\u2019t have stopped even if he\u2019d wanted to; especially not once he heard the husky voice singing longingly over the chords in a language he couldn\u2019t quite place–maybe Polish, he thought.<\/p>\n Small crabs skittered out of the way as land met beach. His feet created first small craters, and then real footprints as the sand became wet. He could see Karol, somehow silver-edged in the night, seated on a huge chunk of driftwood and bent over his guitar. \u201cI would have called you sooner had I known your name…\u201d sang Karol, changing the tune; it was the first phrase in English that Brain could recognize. Then Karol looked up to where Brain stood, just a bit uphill of that huge chunk of driftwood, and his fingers stilled and his eyes caught Brain\u2019s and his teeth flashed the moonlight as he smiled.<\/p>\n \u201cHey.\u201d he said, as though this encounter in the heart of the night was par-for-course.<\/p>\n \u201cHey.\u201d Brain replied, but it came out slightly croaky, so he cleared his throat and tried again, \u201cHey. Didn\u2019t mean to make you stop there.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh, you didn\u2019t.\u201d said Karol, and his fingers again picked up the tune.<\/p>\n Brain found himself wandering closer, but stopped before he could climb up next to Karol, sagging down on the wet sand in front of the log instead, using damp wood for a backrest. They sat there in the night, and despite their distance it seemed to Brain like they were touching. Karol\u2019s voice was like gold in the silver of the moonlight. The dark and the breeze were almost chilly, and still Brain felt warm, wrapped in the music.<\/p>\n A couple of songs later and the tune faded. The notes emanating from the guitar\u2019s belly were wandering and wordless. Karol spoke: \u201cIt\u2019s not just some story, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHmm?\u201d Brain was so far away that the sound of Karol\u2019s voice took a while to get to him. \u201cWhat\u2019s not?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve got a bit of mermaid blood in me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh yeah. Just a bit…\u201d there was hollow noise as the guitar was set down against the log, \u201cBut it\u2019s the bit that counts, I\u2019d say.\u201d Karol\u2019s feet landed next to him, and Brain looked up to see a flat, pale stomach as Karol stretched his arms over his head and his t-shirt rose up. \u201cCome on.\u201d In the next moment Karol was leaning over Brain, hand out-stretched to pull him to his feet.<\/p>\n Obediently, Brain got up, standing next to Karol who was, in one swift movement, removing his t-shirt, suddenly bare-chested in the moonlight and the chill. He had a nice chest, Brain noted, before his mind caught up with his eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cWhoa!\u201d he said, less than eloquent, eyes round.<\/p>\n \u201cCome on.\u201d Said Karol again, taking up Brain\u2019s hand in his own, and pulling him along. They were heading towards the water, towards where the endless miles of sea stood black, low, and heavy.<\/p>\n \u201cWhere\u2019re we going, Karol?\u201d asked Brain. The waves were strong here, he knew, and the water cold even in the middle of summer. He wasn\u2019t too worried, just curious.<\/p>\n \u201cFor a night-time swim, I\u2019d say.\u201d Karol didn\u2019t stop pulling on him, and their hands were locked tight together in Karol\u2019s strong grip. Brain was hesitating a few steps behind, but already the water of the steep beach was past his ankles.<\/p>\n \u201cThe undertow…\u201d he tried.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s not that bad here. Come on, as soon as you get cold you can get out. I just want to show you something.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAs soon as I get cold? That\u2019ll be as soon as I\u2019m in in, with water like this.\u201d He was half laughing; Karol\u2019s excitement was infectious.<\/p>\n \u201cYou feeling cold now?\u201d asked Karol with a glance over his shoulder, and Brain realized that he was up to his waist and they were going deeper, but no, he wasn\u2019t cold. He shook his head but Karol had turned his face back towards the deep sea. And they were so small at the edge-water of the sea in the night. Waves, though calm for this beach, lapped up over the shoulders of his hoodie threatening to knock him over but for Karol\u2019s tight, tight grasp. The sweatshirt was heavy, clinging to him. The next wave brought him off his feet and he bobbed a moment before the receding water set him back down. The next wave lapped up and over his head.<\/p>\n Terror gripped him. Karol\u2019s hand, clutching hard on his finger bones, pulled him down, evermore down. Frantically he tried to kick up, his lips brushing the surface a moment as he gasped half a lungful of air, and then the water crashed closed over his head. Then he couldn\u2019t move. Karol\u2019s limbs surrounded his own, pinning flailing arms and legs. Together they drifted deeper, swayed by the pull and push of the ocean. Brain imagined he could see the large, mirrored bubbles he knew he was making breaking out from his lips. Absolute darkness wrapped around them, like Karol\u2019s body about his own. Coldness crept into Brain\u2019s bones. He fought against Karol, he fought against the entire sea, but everything was so much stronger than him and weakness was creeping in. He was weighed down by the weakness of humanity, the cruelty of the alien element. He gave up. Sand moved against their toes.<\/p>\n Dizzy, fading, he swore he\u2019d hold his air until unconscious. He was going to die but to die with lungs burning full of saltwater — that was too much. Karol\u2019s limbs loosened around his own and Brain thought, \u201cHe knows I can\u2019t escape now, I can\u2019t even know which way is up,\u201d as the ocean\u2019s waves rocked them on to sleep.<\/p>\n And then Karol poked him hard in the stomach, where Brain\u2019s sweatshirt had drifted up, and a gasp of bubbles escaped Brain\u2019s mouth and nose. He opened his eyes and saw Karol, beautiful and luminescent, glowing with some sort of inner candle light. Karol\u2019s golden hair was flowing, floating about his head with the currents of the ocean as they were slowly pulled deeper into the terrible sea; his eyes, their color had changed to a starlit midnight blue; his mouth; his teeth; he was laughing<\/i>. He was laughing and Brain could hear it, despite the saltwater between them. Karol\u2019s hands were still tight around his own, Brain noticed, as Karol towed him close. Again he was in Karol\u2019s arms but this time the arms were gentle; gentle was the touch of their foreheads together, gentle were the words spoken against his lips: \u201cBreath, Brain.\u201d<\/p>\n His chest contracted almost against his will and then as it expanded he drew into his lungs sweet air. He gasped, driving away black edges from his vision, clutching tightly at Karol\u2019s shaking back. Karol was still laughing but holding Brain snugly against him, his arms tight, his hands soft.<\/p>\n Air drove away Brain\u2019s fear and brought anger to replace it. \u201cYou bastard! You absolute, fucking bastard! Did that seem funny? \u2018Let\u2019s fuck with Brian, he\u2019s such a fucking nerd, he won\u2019t notice the fucking set up\u2019? Well, you\u2019ve had your laugh, you ignominious asshole!\u201d Shouted Brain swinging his fist forward to collide with Karol\u2019s diaphragm, but the water deadened the punch and his hand thumped meaninglessly against Karol\u2019s stomach.<\/p>\n \u201cHey… Hey…\u201d Karol looked surprised despite the softness of his words.<\/p>\n But the anger had gone out of Brain\u2019s face. Brain\u2019s eyebrows were up, his mouth was forming an \u201co,\u201d and as Karol\u2019s eyes turned guilty and he started a refrain of, \u201cSorry, God, I\u2019m sorry,\u201d Brain began to laugh in deep bellyfuls. Brain was gripping Karol\u2019s shoulders so hard his fingernails dug in, then he slid his palms up, up Karol\u2019s neck, up to cup his chin, to stroke his cheeks, to brush fingertips against the curve of his ears. Karol was laughing again too, now, holding lightly the wrists of the hands that were cradling his face.<\/p>\n \u201cThat was quite the panorama of emotions there, dude,\u201d Karol said once the hysteria had settled. His eyes were half closed, and he smiled at Brain\u2019s thumbs brushing his cheekbones. .<\/p>\n Brain leaned forward to put forehead to forehead and whispered, \u201cI was so fucking scared! I was so fucking scared! I thought I was going to die but that doesn\u2019t matter now! I\u2019m fucking breathing! I\u2019m here! But god dammit, I was so fucking scared!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry, I\u2019m so sorry,\u201d whispered Karol back.<\/p>\n He was still glowing, Brain noticed, still ethereally beautiful. Even just the movement of Brain\u2019s thumbs against Karol\u2019s cheeks made Karol\u2019s hair dance. Brain watched a moment, enchanted. \u201cAre you really part fucking mermaid?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBrain,\u201d said Karol as seriously as possible, only his eyes still laughing \u201cI\u2019m honest to god \u2018part fucking mermaid\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHow does that work?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cDoes it really matter?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter does it? We are here. This is now.\u201d Brain laughed and crushed Karol in a hug before releasing him just as quickly. Their bodies swayed, slowly rotating in this buoyant world. Brain\u2019s heart was thrumming in his chest and he craned his neck upward, looking at the sea around them. Already glints and glimmers of bioluminescence were visible — star-glow from the midlevel, epipelagic, ocean life-forms in their great nightly migration up the water column toward the air–up to the realm of plenty and of danger. Karol, parallel to him, holding Brain\u2019s hands, let him look, mouth soft and pleased.<\/p>\n Brain could now see they\u2019d gone off an underwater bluff to get here — that\u2019s how they\u2019d gotten into deep water so fast. The sandy slope rose steeply to his right. For a moment his mind was caught in the shift, the sway of the sands, and the sea floor\u2019s gravitational impotence over them. He\u2019d craved this unbound, unfettered, moving ecosystem. Brain couldn\u2019t help but beam his loony grin.<\/p>\n \u201cYou wanna go deeper?\u201d Karol asked at last and Brain whipped around to look at him.<\/p>\n \u201cYou mean, this isn\u2019t it? What are you gonna show me? What is there to see?\u201d<\/p>\n Karol leaned back into the water, still holding Brain\u2019s hands, and gave a push towards the open ocean.<\/p>\n \u201cWell now,\u201d he said, \u201cYou wouldn\u2019t want to ruin the surprise would you?\u201d<\/p>\n Swimming one-handed is a difficult endeavor; swimming hands-clasped with another body can be nigh on impossible. Brain knew this from many long pool rat summers, but again this night proved different. Hand-in-hand with Karol, water moved swift around them, an invisible force pushing them forward with fish-like ease.<\/p>\n They descended, swimming steadily a few meters above the sea floor. Lit by Karol\u2019s fire-like glow, Brain could see the oceanic plain below them, rolling out flat and broad. Occasionally they\u2019d get a birds\u2019-eye-view of some narrow black basalt ridge or mound, sometimes capped with huge sponges, brain shaped, vase-like, or rising up in layered fans — oases in the desert of the ocean floor. Brain could just barely make out a fin, fang, or claw of these sanctuaries\u2019 sleepy diurnal inhabitants before Karol and he had passed on by. It was impossible to say how fast they were going; twinkling lights blinked and flashed all about, shining and disappearing in patterns that gave no reference point for distance or speed.<\/p>\n Still any count of knots or nautical miles paled in comparison to the light-years Brain\u2019s awareness of world and self had traveled. A kind of cold shock trembled in him — he was so small, in such a big world. Holding Karol\u2019s hand seemed his only life-line. Confronting this new, revised, existential awareness didn\u2019t dull the awe; it just added a bittersweet spice to the marvel of the night; a touch of grit in his dream-like wonderment.<\/p>\n A school of tiny, bright, shrimp-like euphausiids glimmered past, swirling around Karol and Brain like leaves in the wind, before dispersing wildly into the dark. Another moment and five squid followed in mad pursuit. Under the orange glow from Karol, the squid looked orange, but blue photophores lit blue lines along their bodies, and made the chase of prey and predator visible even after they\u2019d left the sphere of Karol\u2019s light.<\/p>\n Further on and they passed a huge, silent, fireworks display — a siphonophore reaching out with long bioluminescent tentacles to feed the great, fifteen meters, colony of its body. A thought gave Brain pause. The euphausiids they\u2019d seen, each more than a couple centimeters long, and now this huge siphonophore, indicated they were more than 200 meters below the surface of the ocean. With more than 400 pounds per inch of pressure on Karol and him, all Brain felt was a tingling against his skin, not unpleasant, but like exercising shirtless in the cold.<\/p>\n Even in his wildest dreams, Brain never imagined going unarmored into these depths. Maybe, someday, if he was a good boy and very very lucky, he thought he might be chosen as part of the crew for a research submersible. But in this reality, this now<\/i>, Brain was having a difficult time finding some simile or comparison to express the miracle of this moment. Maybe it was like dashing off a paper and winning the Nobel for it. Maybe it was like randomly dumping two chemicals together and finding the cure for cancer. Part of him was protesting — because he\u2019d done nothing to earn<\/i> this! — and still most of him couldn\u2019t give a flying fuck whether he\u2019d earned it or not. This was here. This was now.<\/p>\n Their measureless speed had brought them to a canyon. Karol\u2019s glow couldn\u2019t reach all the way down it, and Brain stopped at the edge of it, tugging on Karol\u2019s hand. \u201cAre we going down?\u201d he asked, face sore with the wideness of his smile, peering into the gloom below, to the bioluminescent sparks of abyssal life.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ll see,\u201d Karol gave Brain a tug forward.<\/p>\n Craning his head to try to see the mysteries hidden below, he asked, \u201cCan<\/i> we go down?\u201d<\/p>\n Karol met Brain\u2019s hopefulness with a quirked eyebrow and a rueful smile, \u201cYeah… we could. But there\u2019s something I\u2019d like to show you ahead. Is that okay? Sorry, I won\u2019t be an asshole again.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain nodded, and they went on instead. Faced with Karol\u2019s earnestness he couldn\u2019t rightfully respond with anything less than yes. Still he felt a little disappointed as they crossed over the wide canyon and came upon more oceanic plain on the other side — more of the same gray-brown monotony with only occasional interruptions by spiky, migrating sea urchins and small clouds of sleepy fish.<\/p>\n Then, disappointment no more! An escarpment rose before them, sudden, steep, and covered in a rainforest\u2019s profusion of life that at this distance gave the abrupt ridge a colorfully mottled appearance. As they drew closer the colors resolved themselves into sponges and deep, cold-water corals. Living, sparkling stars — fish of a bioluminescent bent — moved along the escarpment, darting in and out of view, through their coral and sponge homes. Star fish and other echinoderms hunted through the rocks, not equipped with photophores, but featuring every color known to nature. Orange crinoids gave a white lacey sponge animated, grasping flowers. Crabs and shrimp circled delicate, pale pink branches of coral. And high, high above, a kelp forest grew in tissue-thin layers of green barely touched by the glow Karol was somehow making brighter, bigger, like he could use it to light the whole ocean.<\/p>\n \u201cCan anything exist like this in the world?\u201d asked Brain in awe.<\/p>\n Karol\u2019s hand holding his gave a squeeze. \u201cHey, Brain, forgot to tell you. You\u2019ve now entered the Twilight Zone.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019d believe it too, it seems probable with all I\u2019ve seen tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut you\u2019d not believe you\u2019re dreaming?\u201d Karol looked at him, and Brain felt his unstoppable smile stretching wider, and the seed of pure happiness growing in his belly, branching down his limbs.<\/p>\n \u201cI might. I\u2019d believe anything about now. Am I?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNah, you\u2019re awake. You\u2019re really and honestly awake. \u2018Cause if you weren\u2019t, I\u2019d have to be dreaming too.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain then remembered the first time he\u2019d seen the sequoias — he was feeling the same echo of blooming joy. The day had been blue and gold, and the deep green of the forest both sharply delineated and somehow blurred with the solid intensity of the sunlight. Looking at the strong red-barked trunks of the world\u2019s largest trees, he\u2019d laughed out loud, hanging his head out the car window, as his uncle drove him up the California coast to his Oregon undergrad university, away from the small town in northern Arizona that had been his home his whole life.<\/p>\n \u201cCareful, Brian,\u201d his uncle had said, smoothly handling the curves of the road. But Brain\u2019s joy was effervescent, and something that could not be held back, something that had to be experienced out and among the giants. He felt his throat tighten and pressure in his nose and kept his face turned away so his uncle couldn\u2019t see the sideways, wind-forced journey of his unstoppable tears. In that moment he\u2019d almost given up on marine biology, given up on fish. This world was so great, overpowering, huge, and he\u2019d craved nothing more than to get lost in it, learn it down to the cellular level. Brain had always had a thing for the otherwordly.<\/p>\n Now alongside the ridge, among this amazing eruption of biodiversity, feeling the echoes of something similar, a giddy bubble in his chest was just threatening to burst. He had to put this strange energy somewhere or it might make him explode — and here surrounded by the wet there were no tears in him to cry. Instead he turned to the man next to him \u2013 smiling and golden — and kissed his grinning face.<\/p>\n Karol\u2019s surprise came out in a bubble of air, before his smile stretched wider a moment, and then his lips softened into Brain\u2019s kiss. They were sideways to each other — Karol\u2019s hand fisted in Brain\u2019s sweatshirt, Brain\u2019s hand around Karol\u2019s waist, necks straining. It was awkward, unbeautiful, and Karol seemed to find that unacceptable as he spun Brian, bringing them chest to chest. Brain was a bit shorter than Karol but the water made up the height difference and they cradled together, Karol\u2019s hipbones a scant inch below Brian\u2019s as Karol held him, hands sliding down to the back of Brain\u2019s thighs.<\/p>\n Brain, underneath the hands, vibrated in the grip and tightly twined their legs together. Karol smiled against his mouth, and Brain could only chuckle. It was all too much. They were drifting downward together, toward the seafloor, their legs too entangled to kick.<\/p>\n \u201cGod,\u201d said Karol, breaking the kiss, \u201cslow down. You gotta slow down…\u201d before returning to Brain\u2019s lips, sliding Brain up his body and biting his way down Brain\u2019s neck.<\/p>\n Brain laughed, head falling back for greater access, and opened heavy-lidded eyes, only to laugh again; they had an audience. Rat-tailed grenadiers circled close, squids and an octopus danced away and returned, probably drawn in by Karol\u2019s uncanny glow. \u201cShit, this is creepy,\u201d Brain said breathlessly while Karol\u2019s lips searched earlobes and throat, \u201cThis is a bad idea of epic proportions.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll stop…\u201d Karol was pulling down the neckline of Brain\u2019s sweatshirt to nip at his collarbone, \u201cLet me know… I\u2019ll stop…\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo.\u201d Brain leaned back from Karol, into the palms clutching his ass, to pull off sweatshirt and tee, \u201cdon\u2019t do that. That\u2019d be an even worse idea.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain\u2019s motion backwards rocked them together, and Karol sucked in through his teeth. Then he ran his hands up, over Brain\u2019s torso, over the skin, apparently enjoying the newly offered expanse. He leaned down again to bite at one of Brain\u2019s brown nipples, and Brian\u2019s arms came around to cradle Karol\u2019s head. \u201cYou don\u2019t have any tan lines–why is that?\u201d whispered Karol to Brain\u2019s breast bone.<\/p>\n It was Brain\u2019s turn to suck in air through his teeth, \u201cI swim a lot, yeah. Just look lower, tan lines there. Shit.\u201d Karol nipped at his chest again. \u201cWhat\u2019s going on here, really?\u201d His voice was strained, almost a groan.<\/p>\n \u201cMagic,\u201d Karol whispered, leaning up from Brain\u2019s navel, where his tongue had been sliding, dipping in and out, before he bit the patch of small tight curls arrowing down Brain\u2019s abdomen from just below his belly button.<\/p>\n Then Brain\u2019s boxers were gone — pushed away by callused hands sliding down, water softened nails scoring the outsides of his thighs as his favorite, old plaid boxers were sacrificed to the ocean. He didn\u2019t give a damn. His attention was focused tight on the underside of his eyelids, and on the lips that kissed his glans once, almost shy, and then the tongue that licked out so strangely tentative. And spit had a different texture than the saltwater and a lightning white fizzle ran up his spinal column. \u201cShit,\u201d he breathed out again, hands still cradling Karol\u2019s head.<\/p>\n Things moved fast then — well, faster. Faster as Karol sucked him down. Faster in the rhythm of tongue, lips, and up-down hands, cradling his balls, and running along his length. Faster in the way of \u201cjust right,\u201d when objectivity was lost, and in the swirl of his head, as all thoughts fleeing but the single fact of \u2018YES\u2019 — then Brain\u2019s toes curled compulsively, once, twice, and he pulled Karol\u2019s head away. He jerked and his come made a small cloud in the water. He noticed this as he looked down toward where Karol stood, feet planted in the silt next to the black basalt of the ridge, long nose nestled in the crook of Brain\u2019s hip, mouth open and gasping.<\/p>\n Karol held Brain up easily, even while blowing air bubbles at the crease of Brain\u2019s groin. Somehow he had wound up entwined in Brain\u2019s legs, one of Brain\u2019s heels caught in his armpit, the other between Karol\u2019s thighs. Karol was jerking himself, desperation twisting his face, beautiful in his intent. A gasp, a sigh, and a vibration — Brain clutching Karol\u2019s head tight to him–and it was over, over so quickly, but for the laughter that bubbled up between them like a living thing.<\/p>\n \u201cYou up for trying that again sometime?\u201d asked Karol, pulling Brain back down to the silt, wrapping his arms around Brain\u2019s shoulders. Karol\u2019s glow had diminished to give them a little, private egg of togetherness in the dark, though Brain was still positive they had some sort of audience at the edge of their light.<\/p>\n Brain\u2019s laugh turned breathless — was he even breathing air? Down here, like this, he couldn\u2019t find the words to say.<\/p>\n Karol bumped his forehead against Brain\u2019s. His unsure smile was out of place on someone glowing like Tinkerbell and magically making somewhat sensible scientists do the impossible: breathe underwater, have too-fast first-time sex. Karol\u2019s arms tightened a bit more and he spoke his next words against Brain\u2019s neck. \u201cI shoulda told you this before, I know, but I like you. Haven\u2019t known you long but I really like you. You\u2019re different and interesting. Didn\u2019t mean for this to happen but I\u2019d like to do this with you. Again. If you want.\u201d<\/p>\n With all the awkwardness of a prom-night nerd,Brain mirrored Karol\u2019s gesture, laying his head on Karol\u2019s shoulder, returning the embrace, and cleared his throat twice to get out the words, \u201cI want.\u201d<\/p>\n Then Karol was laughing again–or chortling more like, with a bubbly effervescence that carried up along the tall strands of the kelp as though it could, with just a bit more intent, bring sun to the entire dark ocean. \u201cYes!\u201d yelled Karol, small jubilation in the greatness around them, pushing off the silt floor towards the night above them, scaring a sand-colored sole out of hiding.<\/p>\n \u201cYou wanna go see that canyon now?\u201d asked Karol as they rose, hand in hand once more. It was a question that took Brain a moment to answer, not just because his eyes had caught on the red, fleshy body of a Tiburonia granrojo<\/i> jellyfish (who\u2019d ever suppose he\u2019d get to see one of those from below?), but because it was a question he found hard to answer. Each new height revealed a fresh perspective of the rock and the life living on it, leaving Brain stupid with awe. He wondered how much more he could soak in.<\/p>\n They were almost as high as the towering kelp forest when Brain at last found words. \u201cI don\u2019t want to jinx it,\u201d he said, and Karol slowed them down until they were just floating there, kelp forest rising as tall as redwoods on the slope of the ridge.<\/p>\n Karol let Brain\u2019s words hang a moment, then said, \u201cYou know, Jim told me about you. Told me he\u2019d a friend almost as nutty about the sea as I am. I\u2019d wanted to meet you, but I didn\u2019t know you\u2019d be so… you. In a good way.\u201d<\/p>\n Brain pulled Karol\u2019s hand, joined with his, to his chest, and bumped their shoulders together. \u201cWe going to do this again, sometime?\u201d he asked, looking into Karol\u2019s midnight-blue eyes, feeling painfully hopeful.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019d like it.\u201d Karol said quietly.<\/p>\n Brain saw truth in that statement, in the earnestness of Karol\u2019s face, and he grinned skyward, toward the stars far beyond the reach of the kelp above them. \u201cWell, we\u2019d best leave some things unseen, then.\u201d<\/p>\n They broke the surface of the water and lounged out against the waves like a couple of sea otters, still holding hands. Brain had no real clue of how long they\u2019d been down there, or how far they\u2019d come. In the east, the faint green of early dawn faded stars from view. Brain knew land was in that direction, but couldn\u2019t see it over the dark water and the curve of the Earth.<\/p>\n Karol\u2019s glow didn\u2019t extend beyond the water, but the warmth he lent the night stayed with them. Brain pulled Karol close and brushed a kiss over the back of his hand, so perfectly happy in the moment. Karol let out a small, pleased chuckle.<\/p>\n With the rock of the waves and the occasional kick of Karol\u2019s feet, Brain knew they were headed somewhere and hoped it was toward their beach, their campsite, and their friends. Still he couldn\u2019t bring himself to care enough to navigate, topped out as he was in a state of exquisite exhaustion. Eyes weighed down by the whole of the day, his mind began to mirror the drift of his body. Even when Karol began to speak he couldn\u2019t wake up enough to give true mind to the words.<\/p>\n \u201cThe thing that gets me,\u201d said Karol softly, like he didn\u2019t care if anyone was listening or not, \u201cIs that people care what goes on beyond our planet — like on the moon, and Mars, and stuff. But what about what\u2019s below the sea? We\u2019ve got mysteries aimed out in two directions — one\u2019s towards the sky, but the other is below our feet, below our boats. There are beautiful things, magical things, below the sea, so why is only space getting the attention here? I just want other people to think about what we\u2019ve already got. That\u2019s what I want.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou do have a way with words.\u201d Brain said, but it\u2019s all he said, even though he agreed, because then sleep claimed him entirely, rocked alongside Karol, in the arms of the breaking day.<\/p>\n \u201cEurgh,\u201d said the hairy weight on Brain\u2019s shoulder. Then Bianca\u2019s head was filling Brain\u2019s entire field of vision, concern, then anger, then heavy amusement crossing her face until she burst out laughing, reached over him and rolled the mass off of Brain\u2019s left side. \u201cEurgh,\u201d groaned the thing again.<\/p>\n A few facts reached the brain of Brain at once. First, the tide had left them high and dry on the beach. Second, he was naked and the seaweed wrapped around him did not make this reality PG. Third, there was sand in places evolution had never intended sand to go. Fourth, Karol was also naked and the way they\u2019d been curled together when Bianca had arrived almost certainly left no doubts to certain aspects of last night\u2019s activities. He opened his mouth to talk and found it too dry.<\/p>\n \u201cWater,\u201d he croaked, and Bianca, crouching beside his prone form, handed him a bottle, the amused smirk never leaving her lips. After a couple of welcome gulps he spoke again: \u201cI don\u2019t suppose I could convince you I had to save him from drowning and we somehow lost our clothes in the process?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOnly works in bad pornos,\u201d she said flatly.<\/p>\n \u201cMaybe we got abducted by aliens,\u201d offered Karol on Brain\u2019s other side. He was lying on his stomach, his head on his arms, looking at Brain. Brain liked the shape of his face in the daylight. It was bony and distinctive in a way that gets better with age, beautifully unbeautiful and Brain wished he was a better poet to describe it.<\/p>\n \u201cSlightly more believable. But really?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh god,\u201d said Brain, realizing how much he could see as he lay on his back. \u201cBlanket?\u201d he asked. \u201cTowel?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNothing.\u201d She replied, her teeth showing and her smile positively wicked. \u201cAbsolutely nothing. This is revenge for me thinking my best friend was dead. Scariest minutes of my life. You\u2019ll give me grey hairs before my time and that<\/i> I do not appreciate.\u201d She\u2019d stood up and was now offering Brain a hand.<\/p>\n \u201cIt amazes me that your ass is almost as white as Jeff\u2019s,\u201d she said, pulling him to his feet, and beginning to dust him off. Karol had made his own way vertical, grinning like a sand-monster as Brain began protesting and Bianca\u2019s brushing hands arrived in places friends\u2019 hands shouldn\u2019t go. Then Karol darted forward and grabbed Brain, bodily hauling him away from Bianca. They ran down the wet sand together, tipping over into icy waves as soon as they hit the water, laughing madly all the while.<\/p>\n The morning was amazingly bright, the light cutting through the fog in golden slants from the forest down on the two figures spluttering in the surf, Bianca laughing at them from the shore. They struggled to their feet, and Karol began to splash Brain, pushing water at him, chuckling as Brain stumbled forward in blind pursuit. Finally Brain caught Karol about the waist, and they tumbled back into the sea together, a mess of limbs and elbows. Shivering in the water and way too aware of Bianca\u2019s watching eyes, her faraway laughter, Brain still held Karol to him. \u201cDude,\u201d he whispered a little breathlessly as the cold of the water seeped into his bones, his lips almost touching Karol\u2019s, \u201cit wasn\u2019t a dream? Are you really?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYup,\u201d said Karol back, through the small space between them, his eyes bright, nervous, and happy. \u201cHonest to god, part fucking mermaid.\u201d
\n<\/a><\/p>\n